A Travellerspoint blog

July 2009

DOM

as a rule i changed the characters name to protect "my identity" =) LMAO!

eversince, lapitin na ko ng mga suspicious characters.
cigar.jpg fortunately, i have an innate talent of driving them away; too bad, i drive even the prospective preys away, as well. every so often i find men, mostly unavailable, hitting on me. since a have an intimidating presence, they find subtle ways to approach me. among them, one man stands out. lets call him DOMeng, which would seem appropriate for his age bracket. Domeng even looks older than my dad. he's a tad though, only half my dad's height. what struck me was that he was always looking from afar. i used to mistake him for another DOM, daddy jules who is from another account. Domeng is also from another account so im not really familiar with him other than him eyeing me all the time during yosi breaks. we've had chance encounters a few months back, hi's and hello's, and once, to clarify that he is not daddy jules. daddy jules is daddy ned and daddy rick's friend, both oldies are my teamates, so we've had our share of chicka sessions while puffing cancer sticks. going back to old domeng; i was soul searching in mars so my mind was elsewhere when he approached me. upclose, you can see he's had decades (more like 6) of summers. he has huge eyebags which reminds me of teroy de guzman. often, he would ask me how my shift was, but today was different. he approached me after finishing his stick and said:

dom: parang ang sarap mong magyosi.
me: huh? (di ba paakyat ka na 'tay?)
d: ikaw, parang ang sarap mo humithit (while looking intensely into my sleep-deprived eyes)
m: (WTF!) antok po kasi ako
d: parang you're always one with your yosi
m: (smiles, di ko nagets yun e)
d: pauwe ka na ba?
m:hindi po, first break pa lang.
d: pauwe na ako e.
m: ah maaga kayo pala nagstart. 2:30 am ako e
d: nako masarap matulog niyang ganyang oras. hanggang anong oras ka pa?
m: 11:30
d:ayan o ang sarap mo talagang magyosi. lagi kitang tinitingnan e (patay tayo jan!) parang ang sarap magyosi pag nakikita kita
m: hehehe (labas sa ilong) bad influence pala ako.
d: di naman masarapa lang talaga
m:(parang nabitin ang sentence ang pangit tuloy pakinggan!) hahaha (awkward!!) sige po akyat na ko.
sumabay pa din si lolo!kaloka sha ha!buti ibang elevator na.

Posted by maharot 13:15 Comments (0)

insomnia

world tour with dax...si alyanna kasi pinagpalit nako hmmph hehehe

sunny

while chatting the afternoon away with jude and jay, i received a text message from dax saying he'll drop by to take a quick bath before he goes to his dentist. i've taken a bath just before that so i was slumped on the floor sans brassière so i got up automatically and put one on. as a warning he shouted before he got to the door which startled me. my new roomie "aimee" thinks he's ok and that i should go for it. i just shrugged and smiled sweetly (sweetly daw?). after taking a bath he was telling me that he was on leave for three weeks due to flu and hypertension..

me: huwaaaaaat? 3 weeks? kamusta ka naman? yun pa yung di ka pumasok nung last time?
dax:oo. ayaw akong pabalikin e ang taas lagnat tapos ayaw nung cardiologist. kung wala akong fit to work from cardio, di pwede pasok.
m: sows style mo ha. ang sarap nun 3 weeks! ako din nga hehehe magiinarte ako!
d: yan naman e wala ka talagang tiwala sa kin (sad face)
m: aaaaw of course not. i believe you! (hugs him while he's putting on his shoes, di man lang pinatapos)
d: kaasar hahaha
m: plastic ba? hahaha
d: tara punta tayo dentist ko at papakainin tuloy kita.
m: yey! gwapo ba dentist mo?
d: oo naman.
m: pota pag yan DOM ha!
======
at the dentist clinic....

he asked me to wait while he had his teeth cleaned. while waiting chinika ko ang receptionist..her name is len.
m: sino ang dentist niya? ( all the diplomas on the wall have female names on them)
l: ah si doc katrina po.

hmmm kaya pala boses babae lang naririning ko. at nakikipagbolahan pa. magaling! magaling!
i texted him...
m: ang gwapo ng dentist mo ha!
d: hehehe
m: nawewet ako niyan!

after the check up...
d: tagal ba?
m: di naman.
d: nagpahot-oil ako sa loob e.
m:saan? (gullible? natatanga na naman ako ha)
d: dun o sa loob...natawa ako sa tinext mo.
m: kalandian mo!
d: ano..pwede ba un?
m: hinde. lapad mukha.
d: saka petite no?
m: oo di ka mahilig sa petite.
d: hahaha tara daan tayo sa nike.

----sa kahabaan ng ayala

d: ano ba yan ang dami mong buhangin! (sabay pagpag na parang hinahagod ang likod ko kung makakiskis)
m: anong buhangin? ginagago mo ba ko??
d: ayan o ang dami! pati jan o (sabay turo sa dibdib ko)
m: ooops! ako na ha! kaya ko na pagpagin yan
d: hahaha
m: lint po yan kasi napasama siguro sa puti (i was wearing a black blouse)
d: ayun o! gusto mo jan kain?
krispy_kreme.jpg
m: saan? krispy kremes? ayoko jan di ako mahilig sa sweets. kaya nga di ako sweet e
d: weh?
m: oo nga.
d: tara!
m: ayoko!
d: e san pala?
m: sa cash and CURRY na lang
d: hahaha curry talaga!
m: op kors! ayan hinahanap nako ng kasiping ko!
d: ha? sino?
m: si alyanna!
d: ah oo nga pala katabi kayo ng kama.sabihin mo kain tayo!
m: ayoko baka kumanta pa yun
d: bat kakanta?
m: kasi tinutukso ko sha e e nung dumating ka sa bahay dati, tinukso niya din ako
d: kelan?
m: nung dun ka natulog.nandun pala sila sa baba, di natin namalayan na dumating. tapos rinig na rinig ni dark ang mga sigaw ko mula sa cr!pagbaba ko kinakantahan na ko ni alyanna ng "be still my heart..." tapos nung nagsindi ako ng yosi sabi ni dark, "after sex, you smoke!" kutusan ko nga d ko napigil e. nahiya ako. sabi ko di naman tayo nagsex
d: wahahahaha talaga?
m: gago yun e
d: si alyanna musta naman?
m: ayun sad
d: bakit?
m: basta....pramis ha (extending my middle finger intead of the pinky which i did with bab; sometimes ruthie)
d: ano yan?
m: magpramis ka (i pulled his middle finger and entwined it to mine) na di tayo magaaway dahil lang sa babae o lalaki! yung babae ko, akin lang hahahaha
d: hahaha pramis
m: alam mo ba pinagtatalunan ka namin ni unagi.
d: nino????
m: si unagi nasa bahay sha nung nagtext ka na punta kami ni jude sa inyo e.
d: ah ok. ano sabi niya?
m: na love daw kita. sabi oo naman love ko sha. sabi niya hindi! inlove ka sa kanya!
d: kanino daw?
m: sayo! sabi ko hindi no.sabi niya natatakot lang daw ako. kasi daw takot ako magtake ng chance.hmph!sabi ko perfect tayo kaya sayang naman. sabi niya "at bakit sha perfect??"
d: hahaha affected?
m: di naman. weno naman? la nang use un ngayon no. nambubuwisit lang yun.
d: hahaha un lang!
-------------sa teriyaki girl, in between sobbing and sniffing over the uber-hot wasabi

d: gusto kong mag-abroad sabi ko nga kay em (friend niya) sasama nako japan tapos magpapatable ako sa mga babae dun, kakandong ako!tangenang anghang (luhaan!)
m: ang laki mo no, ambigat mo kaya hahaha
d: kaso ayoko naman galawin savings ko para punta dun. pambili ko yun bahay sana e.
m: naks!loan ka. mag pag-ivig ka kaya!
d: ano yun? hahaha
m: di ko na uulitin wahahaha
d: hinde nga? ano un???? hehehe
m: ayaw! wag ka nga makialam. wala sa vocabulary ko ang word na yan kaya di ko mapronounce ng maayos wahahaha di nako naniniwala jan. sakit lang sa ulo!
d: pagivig pala ha.sabi nga sakin wag kang pipili ng di mo kasundo o di mo makausap kasi pagtanda di na kayo magsesex! so dapat pili ka ng someone na makakausap mo.
.....silence....
m: ang anghang! napadami wasabi ko!
d: minsan dad's tayo sa megamall! sama natin si art!
m: sige. kakalimutan ko diet ko! hahaha
may babaeng dumaan...
m: maging tibo na lang kaya ako? kaso di ko kayang kumain ng tahong e!
d: hahaha tara kuha tayo babae. tapos kikiss ko muna tapos ikaw naman!
m: heh! tigil! gusto mo lang threesome e yoko no.
d: pramis manonood lang ako!!!
m: no way!tara na bayad na.
d: ako na...
m:nakakahiya naman sayo. di pang soseng's ang presyo hahaha
d: hehehe tara titingin tayo ng shoes...
m: saka brief! para sa basketball mo tom.
d: di na siguro uwe na lang ako. hatid kita, kuha ko bag tapos bukas ulit pag sinipag ako.
m: kaya ka nagkakasakit e. ayaw mo magpahinga.
d: un lang exercise ko e.pakinggan mo to (insomnia)
m: o ano yan?
d: naaalala kita jan.
m: bakit?
d: nung sumasayaw ka sa bar kasama natin si jude. (while craig is singing the chorus, he was dancing my steps)
m: hahaha very good kabisado mo na yan ah.
d: oo no, kinukwento ko sa kanila to e. tawa ako ng tawa pag naririnig ko to naalala kita lagi.
m: hehehe lalo pag nakita mo si athena sumayaw hahaha mas matigas pa sa katawan ni jude!
d: natawa ako dun sa tinitingnan nyong sumasayaw. alam nyo agad na bakla hahaha

i texted unagi on our way home. i said i was cured!

u: cured?
m: di nako affected sa kanya :)
u:la ka bang pasuk?
m: meron e dumating sha e so bonding time!
u: may ganun?
m: uu lagi naman e. pinakain niya ko. di lang 170 ang binayad niya hahahaha

di na sumagot. when we got home, alyanna was there waiting.

m: marz!!!! nandito nako. (sabay dinaganan ko sha)
a: san kayo galing? hi dax!
d: musta ka na?pumapayat ah!nagdadrugs (diet pills) ka pa ba?
a: tagal na hindi
d: so di ka na nagagalit pag madumi bahay? hahaha
a: sira ka!hehehe kaw din pumapayat
m: ayan naman sige bolahin ang isat isa!
d: ano uwe nako?
m: okies tenchu!
d: hmmmmm (hugs n kisses)

a: nagpipigil lang ako ha! (humming "we could be in love")
m:hahaha sira!alam niya yun.inunahan na kita bago ka pa kumanta. kinwento ko na din kasi yung kinakantahan kita kasehodang nakatapis lang ako. tawa sha ng tawa. ayan,di ako inaantok :( nahawa nako sa kanta ni craig....

Posted by maharot 12:25 Archived in Jamaica Comments (0)

teleserye

when a series nears its end, viewers cant help but feel excitement, curiousity, sadness and sometimes disappointment. excitement of new twists, curiousity of how it will end (always a happy ending if its pinoy hehehe), sadness that you wont see them everyday and of course disappointment when it doesnt end the way you want it to. such is the case in our house. two of my beloved roomies has been battling with their inner demons (im not sure if that would be suitable). i may not know the whole shebang but i could detect a rift. and what do people fight about if not love? well, some, money, others, irreconcilable differences (annulment lang?). i know there's a long list but indulge me on this one: it's LOVE. this overused noun, which makes the world go round, has taken it's toll on my two homies. like an age-old telenovela, two friends fight over one lucky bastard (he's quite nice actually). as usual, one would be the bestfriend and the other would be bestfriend's friend (in this case roomate). hay, ang hirap mainlab!!! hahahaha
3143163887_9616f4881e.jpg

Posted by maharot 00:44 Comments (2)

10 bits

tenbits.jpg
it was one frustrating afternoon. like a platform diver suspended in mid air, my heart beat skipped (tried it just once, think i lost conciousness for a few seconds, i swear) while my eyes were fixed on the screen.
chat.jpg

girl: bat ka ba depressed jan? pag di sila naniwala pag nagsabi ka ng seryoso, leave 'em. they're not worth it. naks!!
boy: ikaw na e...
girl: ang ano?
(almost at the same time, after minutes of waiting, it popped on the screen)
boy: ang pinakamakulit!
girl: ang pinakamagaling mag-advise??
girl: hahaha alam ko na yan e sabi din nila im gorgeous at sexy, and i believe them!not to mention, batang-bata!!!wahahaha

..after what seems like forever, no reaction. i tried calling unagi just to vent. when he didnt answer, i tried anakin.

anakin: o ano nangyari?bakit?
me: kakainis e! kala niya ata maatat ako na kulitin sha hmph!
anakin: sino naman yo?
me: sino pa!
anakin: hehehe pinapag-isip ka lang nun!
me: kala niya ha! papayat ako niyan kakaisip, pero never akong magsasabi!
anakin: tingin ko pareho lang kayo ng iniisip.siguro takot din yun.pareho ng kinakatakot mo.
me: ewan!

i took a shower and when i got out i heard my phone ringing. unagi was calling.

unagi: ano nangyari?bat ka tumawag?
me: naiinis lang ako kasi mukhang siyang sira.
unagi: ano?
me: teka kakaligo ko lang e nagsusuot pa ko panty!magheadset ako..ayun nga blah blah blah (same thing i told anakin)
unagi: baka kasi binabara mo?
me: hindi nu! nagbigay na nga ako ng hint na sabihin niya ng maayos e saka tinanong ko naman sha kung bat sha depressed di ba?
unagi: ayusin mo kasi ang sagot mo.
me: naloloka na ko :( ang weird dun e di ko maimagine na bf ko sha!
unagi: ano??
me: alam mo yun, ok lang ako sa kulitan namin, dating if you call it "dating" like dinner or lunch together, movies, inom. hell, i can even sleep beside him in a spoon position and i dont care.pero yung parang magdyowa parang weird yun. and yet papayag akong maging tatay sha ng baby ko di ba. the sex part will be hard though but manageable i hope.
unagi: be, papatingnan na kita! ang weird mo
me: i know pero di ko talaga maisip, na may ganun relationship between us. nasanay na ko sa ganito. kasi never ko nga sha naisipan ng mag naiisip ko lately except sa part na babymaker.
unagi: e di maghintay ka.bat ba di mo maisip na kayo?
me: hindi ko nga alam. naweiweirdan lang ako sa idea and yet naiisip ko naman sha waaaaaaaahCAOLAJOH.jpg
.....................hence 10 bits kasi di ko lam ang ending

Posted by maharot 18:34 Archived in Jamaica Comments (0)

drivin' myself insane

like a recurring bad dream....

they say "an idle mind is the devil's workshop" idle.jpg
how i wish the devil would find work elsewhere. whenever im left alone or not busy chatting, i would automatically go into a pensive mode. in all the years i fell and failed in love, this is the only time i got scared. im afraid to get hurt, that's a known fact, but not afraid to fall and wait for the right time the person will fall for me. i can be very patient, y'know.but this time, even the thought of it makes me paranoid. i always tell people that it's better to be honest and tell the person how you feel and fail in the process than not even trying. yet i cant practice what i preach. i need to be sure first if i really like him, because if it's just lust, i wont tell him anymore.kasi la din naman akong gagawin. bihira naman ako topakin na makipagmake-out. kung meron man, old flames lang o once, parang nadugo2 gang lang ako hahaha. yung di sadya pero di ko alam kung bakit may naganap na milagro, in the first place.
haaay. parang laging may slide show sa utak ko of the "aaaaw" moments that we have. worst, it would be manifested in my dreams. like one time i woke up crying coz in my dreams he was telling me how he really felt all these years. i just cried, as in hagulhol. and was asking him if he doesnt want to be friends anymore. kasi feeling ko, i wont be special anymore. na he would start lying to me about his escapades to avoid fights (which is normal kung magdyowa na kayo). alangan namang ok lang na may mga fubu sha na iba while kami da bah?kamusta naman yun? in fairness to him, kaya naman niyang maging faithful. ang tanong: hanggang kailan yun considering we wont be having sex (well, ideally, matatagalan kasi dapat comfy na ko na makita shang walang saplot and vice versa plus the "pain" factor na more of fear talaga).aaaargh i hate this feeling. i_want_you.jpg
ewan ko pa kung talagang gusto ko sha kasi di ko talaga maimagine na bf/gf relationship ang meron kami. parang gusto ko lang cuddling (with clothes) o kulitan lang like we always do. masaya sana kung sha nga ang magiging sperm donor ko. imagine the family day we would be having. baka mas makulit pa kami sa bata. o mga sportsfest involving parents. o di ba ang cute? ayan kung ano2 na naman ang naiisip ko. tingin ko kailangan ko na magsimba. hmmm perhaps that's what ill do later. it works for me e.
talk.jpg

Posted by maharot 12:22 Archived in Jamaica Comments (2)

afternoon delights

since i had my baby baby.jpg, afternoons became busier. im trying to learn new stuff, application softwares, chatting away, browsing and downloading torrents.of these all, i enjoy chatting most coz i can get in touch with friends from outer space friend.jpg and some local friends. it's my friend unagi whom i always chat with every so often. sabi ko nga he's a charm kasi whenever we're chatting dax would always get in the picture at ibubuzz ako, without me tellin him im online.

it's good that we're friends again, unagi and me. sabi nga ni jude ay parang role reversal lang ito hahaha. yes sha ang gustong bugbugin ni dax para matauhan hahaha. though they're not friends, he's seen him once. kaya naman bet niya ako iuuntog hahahaha. wala na shang alam insultuhin kundi si unagi hehehe pero joke lang naman para bwisitin ako. and lately, baligtad na kasi si dax na ang topic at ang love guru e si unagi. minsan nagulat ako kasi he asked me a question..

unagi: minahal mo ba ako kahit minsan (or something)
me: oo naman
u: hindi platonic ha
m: oo naman

end of story....

actually laging ganun.parang bitin.magtatanong pero la follow up.kaya siguro di naging kami despite years of waiting.nabingkong na ang tenga ni dax tuwing magkikita kami noon.i guess that's one of the factors why we're tight. ang walang sawa niyang pakikinig sa mga hinaing ko sa non-existent lovelife ko. or ang pagiinarte ko pag pinipilit niya kong gawin ang mga malalaswa niyang plano (not necessarily between the 2 of us). or minsan kami lang 2 masaya na kami kahit walang special na ginagawa. like walking in the rain (one of my favorite moments) like kids, ksi yung tig-50 pesos na payong lang yun kaya nililipad. nauwe, wet kami (kaming 2 ha, as in basa sa ulan).
rain.jpg

in fairness to unagi, we've had our share of happy memories. i've always thought na courting involves harana, pagsisibak ng kahoy at pag-iigib ng tubig. may time na i would visit him sa province and the only source of water is tadaaaaan
poso.jpg

u: be, wag ka na maligo
m: mainit e
u: kakaligo mo lang ah
m: kanina pa yun no

he would concede eventually, otherwise, i'd throw a fit. and you won't want to see me in that state. nevertheless, he would still enjoy my company (or pretend to) kahit sukahan ko pa sha.minsan half of his bod was covered with vomit (or what's left of my lunch), not only that, pati shoes soaked with, you know.
suka.jpg and yet, when i apologized, he accepted my apology like it wasnt a big deal. kung si dax yun, he would say "hu u?" daw sa text at kakalimutan na niya ko hahaha. he'd (dax) also be amazed on how i can live without sex.

d: ano ginagawa nyo pag magkasama kayo?
m: movies, inom, malling. parang tayo din lang.
d:mahina pala yun e
m: nirerespeto lang niya ko.lagi na lang ganun.lahat na lang nirerespeto ako. minsan naman bastusin nyo ko!
d:tara!
m: sira hahaha
d: ang tyaga mo din e.ang layo kaya nun
m: masaya na ko dun e. kahit magkatabi lang kami manood ng tv.basta kasama ko lang sha. yung parang ayaw mo matapos yung araw kasi you'll miss his presence.
d:i wont.
m; alam ko di mo sha gusto. im not tempted to do anything nasty with him yet basta lang masaya pag magkasama kami.i guess it's not physical.
d:MALAMANG!
m: heh magtigil ka.alam ko ayaw mo sa kanya.pero gusto ko sha!mahal ko sya! hahaha (monologue sessions ko yan.ate vi mode lang, na usually sha ang audience)
d: eeew
m: ano ka ba. minsan naiisip ko kung kumain na ba sha knowing his situation dun kasi abandoned nga ang drama niya.pano kung la na sha pagkain? ang payat nga niya nung nagkita kami e. kawawa naman.inaway ko pa.di talaga ako sweet. ang funny dun mas sweet pa sa kin ang mga guy friends ko.
d: e puro kasi bakla!
m: hahaha di sila.yung mga straight. si bab sweet yun. bubuhatin niya ko pag ayoko na maglakad.
d: si bab? di ko maimagine na sweet yun (they were teammates in college)
m: sa loob lang ng court mukhang maangas yun, pero sa labas, softie sha. ikaw sweet ka naman ah. minsan nga naiisip ko mas sweet pa ko sayo kasi i never cling to him while walking. di din uso sa min ang beso2 o hugging. except sa pagtulog kasi di ako nahihiyang dantayan sha.
d: style mo ha!
m: ulol. never ko shang hinarass no.
d: e di ba tinali mo na sha?
m: hahaha natandaan mo pala yun.muntik nako dun ha
d: mahilig ka kasi magmakaawa. kung ako yun, giba na ang babae.
m: kaw yun. manyak!hahaha
d: ay nako. bat di mo tanungin?
m: para ano? di nga niya kayang sabihin e. ayoko pagsisihan yun balang araw na kaya naging kami e dahil niligawan ko sha. saka di ko kaya. alam mo naman ang pride. kung di sha magsasabi, wag na lang.
d: narinig ko na yan! pero gusto mo pa din sha?
m: oo naman. pero di ako magsasabi. ang gusto kong lalaki may bayag.ayoko nung naghihintay ng chance na yung babae pa manligaw.
d: ang point dun e gusto mo pa din sha.
m: sino magkakampi?
d: syempre tayo, pangit yun e (hugs)

parte na rin ng afternoon delights ko ang mag-iiyak.a few weeks back, yun ang tema ng hapon ko. di ko matanggap na baka im falling for him. i know ive been comtemplating about it especially when i was trying to move on. i always tell ruthie pag pauwe na kami na what if sha na lang (hindi si ruthie ha). na sana magkagusto na lang ako sa kanya. kaso ayun nga, di ko naman matanggap.sabi nga, "be careful what you wish for". now, im scared shit of it. kahit sa pagtulog umiiyak ako. kasi di ko alam kung ano gagawin ko if ever. im content na sa honest relationship. kasi pag sakali, he wont tell me everything. unlike now na pag tinanong ko sha, he would tell me flat out ang sagot sa tanong ko.he doesnt have to hide kasi no matter what, tag-team kami forever. kahit pa alam niyang papagalitan ko sha, at the end of the day, kami pa din ang magkakampi. minsan naisip ko baka lust lang to. pero bat naman ngayon lang?haaaay kakaloka.feeling ko okay nako.back to basics na ulit.pero i wont forget na, one time, naging part sha ng afternoon delights ko :)

Posted by maharot 08:07 Archived in Jamaica Comments (0)

moving on...

ang problemang mahirap ang solution!

do you ever get over a loved one? either someone you've loved for a long time, someone you loved deeply, or one who caused you so much pain? i used to think it would have a SCAR reaction (my own words). it would hurt while the wound is still fresh, but after that it would just leave a scar, no pain, but there's something left that would always remind you of the "accident" or whatever you wanna call it. there are many scenarios that could be associated with getting over issues....

kung ako na lang sana.... kung_ako.jpg

eto yung medyo one sided. yung ikaw (pa) lang ang nagmamahal. ang masaklap pa minsan, close kayo. ang laging drama jan e ikaw ang takbuhan pag malungkot sya.tapos magsesenti kung bakit iniwan ng dyowa o kaya may iba din shang pinagnanasaan. masakit di ba?kung pwede mo lang sabihin...... "kung alam mo lang kung gaano kita kamahal. na kung bibigyan mo ko ng chance, marerealize mong i'm everything you never thought you've always wanted". ako e, di mo lang ako makita kasi busy ka sa iba :(

one more chance 4one_more.jpg

mula highschool magdyowa na kayo. on and off, pero alam mong kayo magkakatuluyan. until one day, sya na ang nakipagsplit. kaw naman kampante na babalikan ka pa niya, kasi nga he/she cant live without you. kaso naisip niya pala na he/she cant live with you anymore...sad sad sad. hanggang isang araw nabalitaan mo na may bago na sha. at di pa yun, nakilala lang niya sa chat. no this cant be, pano niya yun mamahalin e di naman sila talaga magkakilala pa? gusto mo sanang gayahin si bea " ako na lang, ako na lang ulit"..... tapos magbibigay ka ng long list of promises about things na alam mong ayaw niyang ginagawa mo at sasabihin mong magbabago ka na, pero dun pa din mauuwe,sa wala. nakamove on na sha pero ikaw hindi pa :(

typical love story love_story.jpg

nagkakilala kayo sa office. mabait, presentable, smart, funny. naging kayo at parang ayaw mo na matapos lahat ng happiness. until one day, malalaman mo na may asawa na sha pero sabi niya hiwalay na sila. until one day, sabi niya babalik daw yung ex niya from the states at gusto shang makita. ano mafifeel mo dun?syempre ano naman ang laban mo e may past sila. you only do the best thing, ang lumayo na lang at magmukmok sa bundok tralala. you just wish him/her well and say you'll be fine. tapos susulat ka kay charo at ipapalabas sha sa maalaala mo kaya..winner.

pusong mamon gay.jpg

bet mo sha since forever. kahit 50 feet away nakikita mo ang ningning sa mata niya na feeling mo e sign ni batman at tinatawag ka. ikaw naman kuntento kana sa pagtingin2 kay kuya kasi shy ka at natatakot kang mabugbog. hanggang dininig ni lord ang pagnonovena mo kay st. jude at miraculously, you became friends. kuntento ka na dun e. yung nakakagimmick mo sha with other friends pero alam mo deep inside that you could be happier kung may chance sana na maging kayo.choosy pa ba sha, e mabait ka naman, kaya mo shang buhayin at kahit pa TOP ka e magpapabottom ka ng bonggang bongga mahalin ka lang niya. pero wait there's more. may paglukso ng dugo kang nafifeel pag kasama mo sha. no hinde yun ang heart mong nagpapalpitate kundi ang malansang amoy whenever he's around kasehodang di naman sha rereglahin ever! hala! isa din pala shang kapatid! ang hinayupak, papatol din lang di pa sayo. gagamitan ka pa ng it's not you it's me. di pa sabihin wiz kita bet. pero syempre dahil love mo sha, ayaw mong isiping pinaasa ka lang niya. and for all he's worth, tatanggapin mo pa din sha pag nagsabi shang it's you all along. aminin mo yan, te!yan ang story of your life. sad but true...

someone's always saying goodbyedont.jpg

ikaw ang taong hindi nababakante. di naman dahil mahilig ka pero you're the type na madali iapproach. di sila magdadalawang isip na magparinig kasi mukha namang di ka mananampal. ang totoo niyan, tama sila. ikaw ang tipo ng babaeng di kayang magwala o maghagis ng gamit. in short, iyakin ka lang. pero ikaw ang epitome ng dreamgirl: mabait, pasensyosa, maasikaso, understanding, adventurous and the list goes on. kaya naman tuwing mageend ang relationship, ikaw ay clueless. ano pa ba naman ang hahanapin nila e daig mo pa ang best friend cum barkada doubled with (parang movie tie-in lang???) yaya, cook, labandera, PA at ibpa. tapos bigla na lang shang manlalamig for no apparent reason kasi di ka naman nagger o warfreak.ok alng sana kung nambababae (NOT!!!) pero yung basta na lang nagbago ang mahirap tanggapin.so tatry mo magmove on at panibagong kalbaryo na naman sa next mong "predator".

ang tanong question.jpg
pano ka nga makakarecover?

a. maghanap ng iba...
b. wait for it to die a natural death
c. magpakapokpok at lunurin ang sarili sa alak at drugs
d. umiyak at tingnan ang sarili sa salamin
e. maginarteng di affected pero lagi namang tulala
f. MAG-BLOG!!!!!!

ciao.....

Posted by maharot 12:25 Comments (0)

PART II: wants babies;wont have sex

that same afternoon, ive been having episodes. i got sacred shit of the possibilities of me falling for HIM (name witheld for no reason at all..drama lang hehehe). i dont give in to peer pressure cover_ears.jpg , and i wont assume either, which i think gives people the impression that im dense or unintersted. cant blame me, i dont want to fall for the wrong reasons. i know pain is inevitable but it would be like plunging into a pool head first without knowing its depth. that would be stupid. or am i? wag nyo ng sagutin kasi rhetorical yun. haaaay.

the other night, while we were having late dinner (or a very early breakfast at 200AM). i saw a couple with a pet sharpei. the dog was cuddly but i wanted a bigger pet. like a lab or rottweiler. i find big things cute, bags, phones, appetite hahaha. then i thought of babies (again). i havent felt so pressured. no one's pressuring me this time, they all gave up reminding me of the ticking clock, my biological clock, that is. cant blame them. i never felt the need then. sure id like to have babies but not yet, i told them. not until that effing sharpei showed up under our table ( during dinner/breakfast).
ruthie told me why dont you try pets first? id love to but when will i have a kid? the risk will be higher if i delay it for another year so it had to be this year or anytime soon....

ruthie: e pano ka nga magbubuntis e ayaw mo naman makipagsex? nanjan naman sha, alam naman niya ang gusto mo...kung ako sayo natry ko na yan matagal na especially kung hinaharass naman niya ko.
me: e ganun lang sha talaga.
r: di mo ba naisip na baka...
m: gusto niya ko?di ko maisip e.kasi kalimitan ng chicks niya mapuputi flawless alam mo yun. very pleasant.di pa din ako mapalagay kahit pa ang type niya daw e morena, tsinita, athletic smart...
r: o kita mo na. baka di mo lang nahahalata..
m: e bat ngayon lang? ang tagal na namin magkakilala e
r: malay mo noon pa di mo lang napansin
m: yeah minsan naiisip ko na ang tyaga niya sa kin,di ko naman nakakalimutan yung mga yun e. kaya ko nga sha love because of that.
r: bat kasi di mo try?
m: di ko maisip kasi kung ano magugustuhan niya sakin e di nga ako "fighter"!! sige isa-isahin natin...

a) dahil ba sa galing kong magprito ng spam.jpg

b) dahil ba sa mahilig ako.......sa rice rice_white_plain.jpg

c) ang paminsan-minsan kong paghihilik? snore.jpg

d) o ang kamangha-mangha kong talent na gawing korteng heart ang tyan ko??? imageslove-20tummy.jpg

me: kakailang pa kasi antaba ko na nga.wla na sha alam gawin kundi kilitiin ang Tummy03.jpg ko...

r: ayaw mo naman kasi magrisk.
m: hindi ko kaya. madedepress ako pag nawala sha. sha lang ang nakakapagpasaya sakin ng walang guilt feeling kasi nga platonic kami.
r: walang platonic no!
m: meron, kala mo lang wala pero meron :)
r: sige sino pa ang friend mong platonic?
m: si raspit saka si andoy! alam ko naman di kami attracted sa isat isa
r: hinde!! at one point im sure nagkaron yan.

Posted by maharot 13:45 Archived in Jamaica Comments (0)

wants babies;wont have sex

yes, i'm afraid im serious...ridiculous right? who doesn't want sex at this day and age? present!!!! i guess im a laaaaaaaaaaate bloomer. i remember having my first MU at the ripe age of 25 and havent had a slightest inkling to visit "establishments" to participate in any rigorous activity. the first time i set foot there was primarily due to curiousity. didnt get any success stories, poor exes. had lotsa fun though :)

CA8XI30P.jpglet's get straight to the main point. yes, i want to have a baby/babies. ive always been crazy about kids, being an only child for a long time. id like to say im great with kids, especially the snotty ones and the terrible twos. thing is, i just cant have kids instantly. i dont want to adopt. i want my own kid. and im sure all of you knows how that's done. and that's the thing: I DONT WANT TO HAVE SEX.... CAOLAJOH.jpg

i dont have anything against sex, how can i? i havent met sex. but sex has a following. heard many reviews about it, mostly amazing ;-) still it doesnt reassure me that i'd have the same fate as other women before me who enjoyed it. i think i have algophobia. im afraid of pain. physical pain that is. anything that would involve cuts or lacerations, count me out. i used to be afraid of injections. i had to overcome it when i got in the navy since i opt to donate blood (they say it's healthy). but i have a vivid imagination and i cant stand the thought that my hymen will be ripped during reproduction :(

last sunday, dax, jude and moi went out for a few drinks. supposedly, dax will introduce jude to 2 officemates who're also looking for dates and new friends. fortunately (for the friends or for jude, i dunno really hehehe), the officemates was tired from another gimmick the night before. and then there was three. we started out gimmick with them watching me eat my dinner. just woke up when jude picked me up from the house so i need to eat RICE!!!

after a few drinks, we talked about why we're not hitched yet.
jude: o dax kamusta naman. single ka ba ngayon?
dax: oo march o april pa wala...
j: ganun? e bat wala?
d: wala e.
j: ano bang type mo?
d: dapat gusto na magkababy kasi gusto ko na magstart ng family. saka mature magisip para di na hassle
j: ayun naman pala (sabay tinuhod ako!). o di ba ikaw gusto mko na din magbaby?
me: oo pero magkaiba kami ng gusto. ako kung di ako mahahanap ng prince charming ko, baby lang gusto ko. ayoko ng complications of having a husband.
tawanan... tipsy na kami ni jude e
j: ano ba kasing type mo? give me 5 traits/qualities
m: hmmm syempre matangkad, at least 5'10 o 5'11. smart. funny...nasabi ko na bang smart?
j: oo no
m: hmmm e funny?syempre athletic!saka...
d: e pasok nako sa apat ah

moment of silence... i was thinking e ano naman kung pasok ka sa requirements ko? sabay tuhod ni jude sakin..

m: ano bang panglima? mabait syempre. very general pala.basta kasundo ko keri na yun!

wanted.jpg

when we got home, i offered him a towel so he could freshen up. he was asking for...
d: wala ka bang boxers?
...... i was thinking "ako nga naiilang isuot sarili kong boxers e...."
m: di kasya sayo (baka magpyesta ang bayan pag nanigas ka sa umaga!)
d: kasya, nagkasya nga sayo e.
m:letse!hahanapan kita ng iba..
d:hahaha

we slept in my single sized bed. as usual his big hands were all over my torso. awkward....
hands_off.jpg
i wiggled a bit (we originally had a spoon position) so i was lying upright when he put aleg between mine, i can hardly breath...(i can hear Jude's voice in my head... AAAAWKWAAAAAARD!). alyanna moved a bit and sat right up and commented:

alyannna: o marz, nag-asawa ka na pala? hehehe
me: oo nga te tinake home ko na
alyanna: hi dax!baba muna ko marz.
chance ko na to!!!!para lumipat ng bed.behaved naman sha till morning.nagbreakfast lang kami ng SPAM.
haaaay...to be continued.

Posted by maharot 15:07 Archived in Jamaica Comments (0)

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