ramblings of a semi-scandalous mind

movie lines

2009-10-21T18:55:25Z

Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?
-anna scott, notting hill

Dan: Didn't fancy my sandwiches?
Alice: Don't eat fish.
Dan: Why not?
Alice: Fish piss in the sea.
Dan: So do children.
Alice: I don't eat children either.
-closer

alice: Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off... but it's better if you do
-closer

larry: Don't say it! Don't you fucking say I'm too good for you. I am, but don't say it.
-closer

kat:I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big, dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick — It even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh — Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it that you're not around. And the fact that you didn't call.
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you — Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.
-10 things i hate about you

john: I find you very attractive. Your aggressive moves towards me indicates that you feel the same way, however ritual requires that we engage in a number of platonic activities before we have sex. I am proceeding with those activities when, in point of actual fact, all I really want to do is have intercourse with you as soon as possible. You going to slap me now?
-a beautiful mind

carol: When you first entered the restaurant, I thought you were handsome. And then, of course, you spoke.
-as good as it gets

Oliver Barrett IV: Hey what makes you so sure I went to prep school?
Jennifer Cavelleri: You look stupid and rich.
Oliver Barrett IV: Actually I'm smart and poor.
Jennifer Cavelleri: Uh-uh, I'm smart and poor.
Oliver Barrett IV: What makes you so smart?
Jennifer Cavelleri: I wouldn't go for coffee with you.
Oliver Barrett IV: Yeah well I wouldn't ask you.
Jennifer Cavelleri: Well, that's what makes you stupid.
-love story

Jennifer Cavelleri: You're gonna flunk out if you don't study.
Oliver Barrett IV: I am studying.
Jennifer Cavelleri: Bullshit. You're looking at my legs.
Oliver Barrett IV: You know, Jenny, you're not that great looking.
Jennifer Cavelleri: I know. But can I help it if you think so?
-love story

charlie bellows: If we never see each other again, and one day, you feel a certain presence beside you... that would be me, loving you wherever I am...
- my sassy girl

Julianne: In the beginning it was mostly this prior claim, he belonged to me. But now, when I'm with him, he's just so wonderful. How come I never knew that when I could have had him?
George: It's amazing, the clarity that comes with psychotic jealousy.
-my bestfriend's wedding

Julianne: I have done nothing but under-handed, despicable, not even terribly imaginative things since I got here. But I was... Michael, I was just trying to... to win you. To win you back. But that doesn't excuse any of it. I'm... pond scum. Well, lower actually, I'm like the fungus the feeds on pond scum.
Michael: Lower. The pus that infects the mucus, that cruds up the fungus that feeds on the pond scum... On the other hand, thank you. For loving me that much, that way, it's pretty flattering.
Julianne: Except it makes me fungus.
Michael: Well, that part I knew.
-my bestfriend's wedding

movie lines remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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the proposal part 1

2009-10-15T19:41:17Z

im not sure if im just having hormonal imbalance or ive completely lost my mind (i forgot, this is a given). im planning to propose to my prospective sperm donor..thing is, i dunno how. i mean how do u tell someone that you are serious about having kids and not having a husband.and youre telling this to the person you are proposing to...! not only that, how do u say it in a manner that he'll take u seriously and not have gas laughing about the idea? how about thru text...

or via phone...
me: free ka ba?
sperm donor: huh?
me: makipagsex?
s.d.: hahaha misent! lasing ka ba?

ayan ang nakikinita ko ng scenario knowing him...e kung face to face kaya...

m: busy ka ba?
s.d.: depende.
m: i mean 3Gs. wala ka bang ginagawa, game, girls??
s.d: wala nga e.

ok, nabblanko na isip ko kung ano follow up question!! e kung romantic kaya?naaaaaaaah di ko ata kayang maging romantic sa kanya. sweet pede pa.o kaya daanin ko na lang sa patawa?

m: wanna have coffee then sex?
s.d: huwaaaw! wahahahaha kailan?

maninigas na naman ako kasi di ko lam kung ano isasagot. the problem is, i know i wanna have a baby but i dont know how to go through the process. i think kailangan ko ng sangkatutak na alak. not that it would be an excuse kasi i know what im doing when im drunk. yun nga lang malakas na loob ko. isa pa, pano kung di sha pumayag? kung papayag naman, madami yung kaartehan e. di ako magtataka kung hihingi sha ng floor show o kaya bugbugan muna kami waaaaaaah. yoko ng additional sakit ng katawan. i tried to sleep tapos nanaginip ako. parang favorable naman ang dream ko. nothing sensual really hehehe. i called to unagi to ask what words to use or how to go thru the proposal, not that he's an expert but i think he's the only straight guy left of my close friends.

unagi: seryoso ka ba?
m: oo naman no.alam mo naman yun ang plano ko sa kanya e.
u: bat di sa sunday na lang pagkatapos ng gimik
m: meron ako e, malabo yun. saka ano, free ride?? sabi ko naman sa kanya dati isang beses lang namin gagawin e
u: di naman nagagwa yun ng isang beses
m: eeeeeeh feeling ko naman buntisin(???) ako e, regular ako magkaron e
u: oo nga kaso di ganun kadali yun.
m: yun nga lang. e ngayon pa lang di ko na lam kung pano kami gagawa ng baby.kailangan ko ng alak!kaso di naman madali malasing yun. dati isang vodka kami 2, hanggang the next day sumusuka pa ko pagkagising e. samantalang sha, after nun, inubos pa ang isang san miguel na blue sila nung pinsan niya tapos kinakaladkad pako mag beer ulit.gudlak!
u: ah malakas ba uminom?
m: oo. isa pa un, gagaguhin ako nun pag lasing na ko. baka kung ano2 pa demands kasi dati nung una kong sinabi yung plan ko, sabi niya dapat twice a year magpapractice kami, kasi nga diba in 3 yrs time ko pa balak nung una kong binanggit sa kanya.sabi ba naman para daw di ko hanap-hanapin! haller!?! ako pa pala ang maghahanap. duh?!
u: e pano kung after nung iwasan ka na niya?
m: bat naman miya gagawin yun?
u: may ganung lalaki e.
m: di mabuti.di sha makikialam sa pagpapalaki ko ng baby ko. baka pati pangalan makialam sha e. gusto ko 4 leter name lang para di hirap magsulat. gusto ko sana name niya pero ayoko ng junior! (lahat ata ng junior na kilala ko naging wasted youth hahaha). di din naman ako hihingi ng kung ano sa kanya.
u: e pano kung di pumayag?
m: aawayin ko sya, para konting sperm lang pagdadamot pa, e ang dami na niyang nasayang sa tissue, kama, cr o kung san man nagsitalsikan ang mga nilabas niya dati.
u: hahaha yun pala e.tingin mo papayag?
m:pumayag naman sha dati e. nung niretract ko na yung pact, tinanong lang niya kung bakit. tapos napagusapan lang namin nung lumabas kami nina jude a few months ago.
u: e di sa card mo sabihin para di nakakahiya
m: never naman ako nahiya sa kanya e kahit gaano pa ka bastos ang usapan di naman kami naiilang.ang corny ng card ha, ano manliligaw?
u: e di ganito, lahat ng sasabihin mo lagay mo sa card tapos suksukan mo ng condom!
m: duh?! condom e gusto ko nga magkababy e!
u: di yung butas na condom lagay mo
m: eeeeeh
u: basta text moko kung ano mangyari sa pagpropropose mo ha...

the proposal part 1 remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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amore

2009-10-21T15:03:55Z

If all the world and love were young,
And truth in every shepherd's tongue,
These pretty pleasures might me move
To live with thee and be thy love.

-Sir Walter Raleigh
The Nymph's reply to the Sheperd

i'm in love, for the nth time i guess hehehe. i watched the ugly truth and fell for gerard's character mike, whose cynicism about love embodies most (heart-broken) people's perception of how relationships get fucked up eventually. he's the "get it down and dirty" type of guy, who evntually falls for an anal retentive control freak, abby, catherine heigl's character. ive graduated from chick flicks but i enjoyed this one. it's nice to see guys at a loss for words sometimes. the dancing part was sexy but the elevator moment was sexier!i always have those awkward moments when you want to do something stupid. im just afraid i'll regret it the next day, or worse, immediately after. heniways, a day went by and there i was, watching gerry again in tomb raider 2. it was unintentional, my homies chose it over tomb raider 1. i was in for a big surprise...his bod resembles king leonidas' but the face was, well, softer. or should i say hotter! it was smaller, "less muscled" if i may say so. which also reminds me of a beefy version of matthew fox.

another love of my life is clive owen. i love him in closer.especially the part he's begging for julia to stay with him and began crying. i havent cried watching a love story i cant relate with;very seldom. but seeing him cry, i cried on cue. his character larry seemed to be the guy i could spend my whole life with: funny,smart, good looking, not to mention sexy. he exudes raw sexuality. he's not as good-looking as most action stars but he's just sexy. perhaps it's the smile or how he talks. i only discovered now that a guy's voice or accent makes him sexy. i started noticing gerard when i saw him in P.S. I love you. the accent made me melt. even with jeffrey dean morgan's character, william. i like irish better, i think, even if i dont really understand what they're saying hahaha. tutal if my dreams come true, i won't let them talk anyway.

i told dax about it and being the pervert that he is, our conversation went from just a plain profession of my feelings to oh well a different story.

m: im in luuuuuuuurve
d: wat? agen?
m: nalilito ako between clive and gerard. pero id take them in a heartbeat if they ask me to have a wild steamy sex with them!
d: hahaha kahit sabay sa p*p* at sa p*et?
m: im sorry i dont do 3somes. ill get confused who to moan for...
d: ay tabla!
m: di ako pwede sa ganun malilito ako. must be the weather. kung ano2 naiisip ko.
d: bad yan!
m: dahil walang action??? hmmm i could go to london and be clive's concubine or to new york to be gerard's effing whore..am i brilliant or wat???
d: or wat!?!

i told unagi about it and he said " ang halay naman". told him he's always been a pervert and im used to it. he's not the shy type hahaha.rereypin ko na yun e! then he said "try mo...baby time!!". told him im just thinking of the right words but i fell asleep hahaha. i woke up sad. i didnt even see gerry and clive in my dreams, instead i saw eddie garcia with 3 wives. parang mala-dynasty ang setting ng panaginip ko. awayan ng mga misis ni eddie garcia. too bad i cant remember everything hehehe. buti na lang di ako kasma sa cast!

amore remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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Nikita

2009-11-13T13:36:13Z

i got to the office 45 minutes earlier than my shift. i lil groggy due to lack of sleep, i was greeted by male colleagues who teased "aba, himala ang aga mo ah" to which i replied, "ulol lagi akong maaga, pag hindi, ibig sabihin di nako papasok! hahaha"

they laughed and started talking about me as if im not there.

nicholo: yan ang magandang girlfriend, cool na cool!yun nga lang pag nagkamali ka bugbog agad! (laughter)

i pretended not to hear them and faced my slower than molasses pc. the conversation continued until i heard the words angelina jolie, suabe, and Assasin. thinking they were referring to my kinda guy...

maharot: ha? di ako mahilig sa bad boys no.gusto ko lang manly.
benjie: ano?
m: ano bang pinaguusapan nyo? yung type kong guy?
nichollo: hinde! sabi namin, ikaw yung tipong matapang, yung parang pang action movie na spy o kaya mala angelina jolie type na babae sa movies
m: so ako pala yung Assasin? sorry, more of a serial killer hahaha.

hmmm i forgot to thank them for the angelina likeness ( i know it's not in the looks department, but i get the drift). pero medyo napaisip ako. mukha pala akong assasin??? not that im bothered since they (nichollo, jessie and benjie) are not prospects and they're all happily taken and not my "bet" too. i know im intimidating but i never liked guns.not when i was in the navy and definitely not now. i did some shooting from rifles and .45 caliber, and i could disassemble both in a considerable amount of time ( it was a requirement for an anti-terrorist course i took back then). but contrary to public opinion, i didnt get tough because i was a soldier. i barely left the office, aside from that month long training i had. back in elementary, i would pick fights with boys, be friends with them.

i was never the "girlie" type, more like one of the boys. boys would fall in line just to play with me and my friend shei (o huwag madumi ang utak, magaling kami magsipa, the one with thick washers aka tingga). black magic, tulpit - that's what we call it when you can kick the washer for more than 15-20 meters away. i can hit it with my elbow, knees or the part of the arm that bends- humerus, but i do it best using my left foot, which seemed strange since im right handed. i dont know how it's called, ambidextrous is for the hands. ah basta all i know is that im usually ambivalent hahaha.

i really dont know what caused my so-called "toughness". perhaps it started when i was hanging out with boys early on. initially (that's after i realized that there's more to childhood than talking to yourself hahaha. i was an only child back then and i never had an imaginary friend, so i talk to myself teehee), i have 3 friends who are cousins, chris and charlie, and chris' sister tin. usually the games we play are for boys. tin though, being 5 years ahead of me got conscious so she stopped playing rough games with us. i was then left with the boys. when we transferred to manila, we used to play chato/shato, tatsing (touching? hehe) and roleplaying bioman characters. we're 5: shei, carrie, anton, rich and yours truly. since bioman only has 2 girls, shei and carrie would fight over who pink 5 will be. since at that age i already resent conflict, i opted to be blue 3. anton and rich fought a lot about who will be red 1, so i dont have any choice. im taller than all of them and very lanky at that. no boobies at all (i was 11), so i dont have any trouble taking the role meant for a boy. during that time we had a pool in the village so my dad would bring me there to practice swimming. most fathers would like a junior. unfortunately, i only looked like one. but it didint stop my dad from teaching me guy stuff. from picking on bullies to lighting a cigarette (he was checking if i know how in college). i remember when i was 9 or 10 he asked me if someone bullies me at school. i said no one ( im not the type you wanna bully, im friendly back then). he insisted that if someone made a mistake of pushing me around, i should get a small rock and hit their head with it. how's that for my first lesson for self defense. more like my father would like me to have my first trip to the precinct. anyway, at 11, i was diving like crazy on a 6ft pool with my 4' something height. having flat chest is an advantage hehehe. it doesnt hurt too much pag plakda ang dive! i was also educated in an exclusive school in high school. not that it contributed more to my being boyish. never had any homosexual flings though. im not very active socially. i have a fair share of friends, mostly girls. no make that all girls. it was only in college when i met guys, babsy and pogi who became my roomies. my other set of friends consists mostly of guys: brandy, romeo, xander, stevie, berdie, licky, janus, mikhail and leeyow.

i remembered some comments i got before, which usually comes up when i begin asking friends why im not hitched. my imagination begin to spin a documentary or some sort of a survey where respondents answer the dreaded question : Why is maharot on the road to spinsterdom?

babsy: mahirap ligawan si johnny (his nickname for me), masunget!
barney: nanapok yun e pag ninakawan ng halik!believe me, namaga ilong ko e!
iron: ah e kakatakot e. kahit nga ngayon na nakakausap ko na sha natatakot pa din ako e!
dax: di sila uubra!wahahaha
rc: parang ang saya niyang gf, kaya lang nakakatakot e. parang mananapok lagi.
unagi: di sha "manageable" na gf...
jude: di kasi approachable ang lola nyo!
ruthie: uhmm kasi harsh siya???
athena: nakakatakot magalit si ati!!!
jerry: parang mata ko lang walang latay pag nahuli niya ko nagfflirt...
mikhail: she look unavailable and uninterested. very intimidating i must say....
brandy: a misandryst biaaaatch...peace sistaaah!
romeo: susuka yan sa kotse pag nilasing nyo.
leeyow: mabigat yan pag nagpabuhat na,kaya wag papainumin!
pogi: katakot e kahit good mood hahaha

well that's the not so wholesome part, but i bet they have more to say if i ask them about my good traits.... right guys?

hey...where did everyone go???

Nikita remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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what do i do

2009-08-07T06:15:06Z

WHAT DO I DO
Nyoy Volante
Acoustics: Nyoy With Mannos [2003]

INTRO

What would you do if I told you that
All that I do's think of what we had
What would you do if I'm not the friend I used to be
Well, at least, not to me

REFRAIN 1
'Cause I can't get over all the times you stay
Get crazy, jealous every time you're away
Now I'm someone different from the one you knew
Had nothing to feel for you, to feel for you

CHORUS
What do I do
I keep calling out your name
What do I do
I got no one else to blame
What do I do
Every time I hold your hand, it's not the same
What do I do
I think I fell in love with you

What can I do, what can I say
Everything keeps changing every night, every day
Every word so diff'rent, every touch so real
Every glance and every look reveals the way I feel

No, it's never ever gonna be the same
When we hug for warmth from the cold of the rain
Yet I'm not gonna move on, not gonna change
Though I find it hard to say, baby

[Repeat CHORUS]

BRIDGE
I don't know what to do
I'm fallin' more for you
Baby, please tell me...

[Repeat CHORUS]

CODA
Ooh oh
What do I do

what do i do remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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tagayan

2009-08-01T23:16:34Z

jigs: tagay mo na, may lagnat na yan! pucha, kung ayaw mo ako na lang! sabay inom)

**parang gusto ko lagnatin, magkabulutong kaya ako ng 2 weeks habang nandito si denise?hmmmm not bad!ang galing ko talaga magisip! good job!

hyubs: alangya e ininom mo din e! dayaan na toooo! minsan lang dumating ang labs ko e, lalamangan mo pako! tagayan moko ulit! naknam!

denise: tama na yan sweetie, uwe na tayo, pagod ako sa flight e. jigs wag mo na sha painumin, tapusin nyo na yan.

last night na to, pramis! mula grade 3, sidekick nako ni hubert. bert pa palayaw niya nun kaso nung nauso si hyubs na kahawig daw ni hubert webb, pinalitan na din niya ang palayaw namin. para daw cool. kaya mula sa diego, naging jigs ako. mabait naman din si kumag. para na kaming magkapatid, lahat ng sa kanya, akin na din. kung pwede ko lang hingiin si denise baka ibigay nito e. haaay denise, unang araw pa lang sa Bio class naninikip na dibdib ko sa yo. yun nga lang, torpe ako. kakabalik lang niya galing sa canada. nurse siya dun e.
pero kahit pa naging lap dancer siya ok lang sakin.

hyubs: teka muna labs, ngayon lang tayo magkikita-kita ulit e. tagal ko ng di nakakasama tong bespren ko. huli ko tong nakita nung hinatid ka namin sa airport. tapos di nako masyado tinatawagan sa bahay. nauso na ang facebook at twitter,wala pa din!

jigs: alam mo namang di ako techie e.wala akong alam jan pare.

hyubs: palusot ka pa.sabihin mo nagpapayaman ka na para sa mapapangasawa mo.

denise: ay binata ka na ha!di man lang nagkkwento.

jigs: wala pa no.

ang totoo wala, kasi walang pag-asa na magustuhan ako ng mahal ko. kasi may iba na shang mahal. at hanggang nandyan ka hyubs, walang patutunguhan ang pag-iipon ko.

hyubs: boooooo ayaw pang aminin! kung ako lang may naipon na papakasal na din ako e. dahil sha lang ang nagiisa sa buhay ko! naks!

oo naiintindihan ko, sha din ang nagiisa sakin....

tagayan remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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DOM

2009-07-31T23:24:49Z

eversince, lapitin na ko ng mga suspicious characters.
fortunately, i have an innate talent of driving them away; too bad, i drive even the prospective preys away, as well. every so often i find men, mostly unavailable, hitting on me. since a have an intimidating presence, they find subtle ways to approach me. among them, one man stands out. lets call him DOMeng, which would seem appropriate for his age bracket. Domeng even looks older than my dad. he's a tad though, only half my dad's height. what struck me was that he was always looking from afar. i used to mistake him for another DOM, daddy jules who is from another account. Domeng is also from another account so im not really familiar with him other than him eyeing me all the time during yosi breaks. we've had chance encounters a few months back, hi's and hello's, and once, to clarify that he is not daddy jules. daddy jules is daddy ned and daddy rick's friend, both oldies are my teamates, so we've had our share of chicka sessions while puffing cancer sticks. going back to old domeng; i was soul searching in mars so my mind was elsewhere when he approached me. upclose, you can see he's had decades (more like 6) of summers. he has huge eyebags which reminds me of teroy de guzman. often, he would ask me how my shift was, but today was different. he approached me after finishing his stick and said:

dom: parang ang sarap mong magyosi.
me: huh? (di ba paakyat ka na 'tay?)
d: ikaw, parang ang sarap mo humithit (while looking intensely into my sleep-deprived eyes)
m: (WTF!) antok po kasi ako
d: parang you're always one with your yosi
m: (smiles, di ko nagets yun e)
d: pauwe ka na ba?
m:hindi po, first break pa lang.
d: pauwe na ako e.
m: ah maaga kayo pala nagstart. 2:30 am ako e
d: nako masarap matulog niyang ganyang oras. hanggang anong oras ka pa?
m: 11:30
d:ayan o ang sarap mo talagang magyosi. lagi kitang tinitingnan e (patay tayo jan!) parang ang sarap magyosi pag nakikita kita
m: hehehe (labas sa ilong) bad influence pala ako.
d: di naman masarapa lang talaga
mparang nabitin ang sentence ang pangit tuloy pakinggan!) hahaha (awkward!!) sige po akyat na ko.
sumabay pa din si lolo!kaloka sha ha!buti ibang elevator na.

DOM remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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insomnia

2009-07-31T20:10:17Z

while chatting the afternoon away with jude and jay, i received a text message from dax saying he'll drop by to take a quick bath before he goes to his dentist. i've taken a bath just before that so i was slumped on the floor sans brassière so i got up automatically and put one on. as a warning he shouted before he got to the door which startled me. my new roomie "aimee" thinks he's ok and that i should go for it. i just shrugged and smiled sweetly (sweetly daw?). after taking a bath he was telling me that he was on leave for three weeks due to flu and hypertension..

me: huwaaaaaat? 3 weeks? kamusta ka naman? yun pa yung di ka pumasok nung last time?
dax:oo. ayaw akong pabalikin e ang taas lagnat tapos ayaw nung cardiologist. kung wala akong fit to work from cardio, di pwede pasok.
m: sows style mo ha. ang sarap nun 3 weeks! ako din nga hehehe magiinarte ako!
d: yan naman e wala ka talagang tiwala sa kin (sad face)
m: aaaaw of course not. i believe you! (hugs him while he's putting on his shoes, di man lang pinatapos)
d: kaasar hahaha
m: plastic ba? hahaha
d: tara punta tayo dentist ko at papakainin tuloy kita.
m: yey! gwapo ba dentist mo?
d: oo naman.
m: pota pag yan DOM ha!
======
at the dentist clinic....

he asked me to wait while he had his teeth cleaned. while waiting chinika ko ang receptionist..her name is len.
m: sino ang dentist niya? ( all the diplomas on the wall have female names on them)
l: ah si doc katrina po.

hmmm kaya pala boses babae lang naririning ko. at nakikipagbolahan pa. magaling! magaling!
i texted him...
m: ang gwapo ng dentist mo ha!
d: hehehe
m: nawewet ako niyan!

after the check up...
d: tagal ba?
m: di naman.
d: nagpahot-oil ako sa loob e.
m:saan? (gullible? natatanga na naman ako ha)
d: dun o sa loob...natawa ako sa tinext mo.
m: kalandian mo!
d: ano..pwede ba un?
m: hinde. lapad mukha.
d: saka petite no?
m: oo di ka mahilig sa petite.
d: hahaha tara daan tayo sa nike.

----sa kahabaan ng ayala

d: ano ba yan ang dami mong buhangin! (sabay pagpag na parang hinahagod ang likod ko kung makakiskis)
m: anong buhangin? ginagago mo ba ko??
d: ayan o ang dami! pati jan o (sabay turo sa dibdib ko)
m: ooops! ako na ha! kaya ko na pagpagin yan
d: hahaha
m: lint po yan kasi napasama siguro sa puti (i was wearing a black blouse)
d: ayun o! gusto mo jan kain?

m: saan? krispy kremes? ayoko jan di ako mahilig sa sweets. kaya nga di ako sweet e
d: weh?
m: oo nga.
d: tara!
m: ayoko!
d: e san pala?
m: sa cash and CURRY na lang
d: hahaha curry talaga!
m: op kors! ayan hinahanap nako ng kasiping ko!
d: ha? sino?
m: si alyanna!
d: ah oo nga pala katabi kayo ng kama.sabihin mo kain tayo!
m: ayoko baka kumanta pa yun
d: bat kakanta?
m: kasi tinutukso ko sha e e nung dumating ka sa bahay dati, tinukso niya din ako
d: kelan?
m: nung dun ka natulog.nandun pala sila sa baba, di natin namalayan na dumating. tapos rinig na rinig ni dark ang mga sigaw ko mula sa cr!pagbaba ko kinakantahan na ko ni alyanna ng "be still my heart..." tapos nung nagsindi ako ng yosi sabi ni dark, "after sex, you smoke!" kutusan ko nga d ko napigil e. nahiya ako. sabi ko di naman tayo nagsex
d: wahahahaha talaga?
m: gago yun e
d: si alyanna musta naman?
m: ayun sad
d: bakit?
m: basta....pramis ha (extending my middle finger intead of the pinky which i did with bab; sometimes ruthie)
d: ano yan?
m: magpramis ka (i pulled his middle finger and entwined it to mine) na di tayo magaaway dahil lang sa babae o lalaki! yung babae ko, akin lang hahahaha
d: hahaha pramis
m: alam mo ba pinagtatalunan ka namin ni unagi.
d: nino????
m: si unagi nasa bahay sha nung nagtext ka na punta kami ni jude sa inyo e.
d: ah ok. ano sabi niya?
m: na love daw kita. sabi oo naman love ko sha. sabi niya hindi! inlove ka sa kanya!
d: kanino daw?
m: sayo! sabi ko hindi no.sabi niya natatakot lang daw ako. kasi daw takot ako magtake ng chance.hmph!sabi ko perfect tayo kaya sayang naman. sabi niya "at bakit sha perfect??"
d: hahaha affected?
m: di naman. weno naman? la nang use un ngayon no. nambubuwisit lang yun.
d: hahaha un lang!
-------------sa teriyaki girl, in between sobbing and sniffing over the uber-hot wasabi

d: gusto kong mag-abroad sabi ko nga kay em (friend niya) sasama nako japan tapos magpapatable ako sa mga babae dun, kakandong ako!tangenang anghang (luhaan!)
m: ang laki mo no, ambigat mo kaya hahaha
d: kaso ayoko naman galawin savings ko para punta dun. pambili ko yun bahay sana e.
m: naks!loan ka. mag pag-ivig ka kaya!
d: ano yun? hahaha
m: di ko na uulitin wahahaha
d: hinde nga? ano un???? hehehe
m: ayaw! wag ka nga makialam. wala sa vocabulary ko ang word na yan kaya di ko mapronounce ng maayos wahahaha di nako naniniwala jan. sakit lang sa ulo!
d: pagivig pala ha.sabi nga sakin wag kang pipili ng di mo kasundo o di mo makausap kasi pagtanda di na kayo magsesex! so dapat pili ka ng someone na makakausap mo.
.....silence....
m: ang anghang! napadami wasabi ko!
d: minsan dad's tayo sa megamall! sama natin si art!
m: sige. kakalimutan ko diet ko! hahaha
may babaeng dumaan...
m: maging tibo na lang kaya ako? kaso di ko kayang kumain ng tahong e!
d: hahaha tara kuha tayo babae. tapos kikiss ko muna tapos ikaw naman!
m: heh! tigil! gusto mo lang threesome e yoko no.
d: pramis manonood lang ako!!!
m: no way!tara na bayad na.
d: ako na...
m:nakakahiya naman sayo. di pang soseng's ang presyo hahaha
d: hehehe tara titingin tayo ng shoes...
m: saka brief! para sa basketball mo tom.
d: di na siguro uwe na lang ako. hatid kita, kuha ko bag tapos bukas ulit pag sinipag ako.
m: kaya ka nagkakasakit e. ayaw mo magpahinga.
d: un lang exercise ko e.pakinggan mo to (insomnia)
m: o ano yan?
d: naaalala kita jan.
m: bakit?
d: nung sumasayaw ka sa bar kasama natin si jude. (while craig is singing the chorus, he was dancing my steps)
m: hahaha very good kabisado mo na yan ah.
d: oo no, kinukwento ko sa kanila to e. tawa ako ng tawa pag naririnig ko to naalala kita lagi.
m: hehehe lalo pag nakita mo si athena sumayaw hahaha mas matigas pa sa katawan ni jude!
d: natawa ako dun sa tinitingnan nyong sumasayaw. alam nyo agad na bakla hahaha

i texted unagi on our way home. i said i was cured!

u: cured?
m: di nako affected sa kanya
u:la ka bang pasuk?
m: meron e dumating sha e so bonding time!
u: may ganun?
m: uu lagi naman e. pinakain niya ko. di lang 170 ang binayad niya hahahaha

di na sumagot. when we got home, alyanna was there waiting.

m: marz!!!! nandito nako. (sabay dinaganan ko sha)
a: san kayo galing? hi dax!
d: musta ka na?pumapayat ah!nagdadrugs (diet pills) ka pa ba?
a: tagal na hindi
d: so di ka na nagagalit pag madumi bahay? hahaha
a: sira ka!hehehe kaw din pumapayat
m: ayan naman sige bolahin ang isat isa!
d: ano uwe nako?
m: okies tenchu!
d: hmmmmm (hugs n kisses)

a: nagpipigil lang ako ha! (humming "we could be in love")
m:hahaha sira!alam niya yun.inunahan na kita bago ka pa kumanta. kinwento ko na din kasi yung kinakantahan kita kasehodang nakatapis lang ako. tawa sha ng tawa. ayan,di ako inaantok nahawa nako sa kanta ni craig....

insomnia remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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10 bits

2009-07-25T08:14:35Z

it was one frustrating afternoon. like a platform diver suspended in mid air, my heart beat skipped (tried it just once, think i lost conciousness for a few seconds, i swear) while my eyes were fixed on the screen.

girl: bat ka ba depressed jan? pag di sila naniwala pag nagsabi ka ng seryoso, leave 'em. they're not worth it. naks!!
boy: ikaw na e...
girl: ang ano?
(almost at the same time, after minutes of waiting, it popped on the screen)
boy: ang pinakamakulit!
girl: ang pinakamagaling mag-advise??
girl: hahaha alam ko na yan e sabi din nila im gorgeous at sexy, and i believe them!not to mention, batang-bata!!!wahahaha

..after what seems like forever, no reaction. i tried calling unagi just to vent. when he didnt answer, i tried anakin.

anakin: o ano nangyari?bakit?
me: kakainis e! kala niya ata maatat ako na kulitin sha hmph!
anakin: sino naman yo?
me: sino pa!
anakin: hehehe pinapag-isip ka lang nun!
me: kala niya ha! papayat ako niyan kakaisip, pero never akong magsasabi!
anakin: tingin ko pareho lang kayo ng iniisip.siguro takot din yun.pareho ng kinakatakot mo.
me: ewan!

i took a shower and when i got out i heard my phone ringing. unagi was calling.

unagi: ano nangyari?bat ka tumawag?
me: naiinis lang ako kasi mukhang siyang sira.
unagi: ano?
me: teka kakaligo ko lang e nagsusuot pa ko panty!magheadset ako..ayun nga blah blah blah (same thing i told anakin)
unagi: baka kasi binabara mo?
me: hindi nu! nagbigay na nga ako ng hint na sabihin niya ng maayos e saka tinanong ko naman sha kung bat sha depressed di ba?
unagi: ayusin mo kasi ang sagot mo.
me: naloloka na ko ang weird dun e di ko maimagine na bf ko sha!
unagi: ano??
me: alam mo yun, ok lang ako sa kulitan namin, dating if you call it "dating" like dinner or lunch together, movies, inom. hell, i can even sleep beside him in a spoon position and i dont care.pero yung parang magdyowa parang weird yun. and yet papayag akong maging tatay sha ng baby ko di ba. the sex part will be hard though but manageable i hope.
unagi: be, papatingnan na kita! ang weird mo
me: i know pero di ko talaga maisip, na may ganun relationship between us. nasanay na ko sa ganito. kasi never ko nga sha naisipan ng mag naiisip ko lately except sa part na babymaker.
unagi: e di maghintay ka.bat ba di mo maisip na kayo?
me: hindi ko nga alam. naweiweirdan lang ako sa idea and yet naiisip ko naman sha waaaaaaaah
.....................hence 10 bits kasi di ko lam ang ending

10 bits remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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teleserye

2009-07-25T08:12:31Z

when a series nears its end, viewers cant help but feel excitement, curiousity, sadness and sometimes disappointment. excitement of new twists, curiousity of how it will end (always a happy ending if its pinoy hehehe), sadness that you wont see them everyday and of course disappointment when it doesnt end the way you want it to. such is the case in our house. two of my beloved roomies has been battling with their inner demons (im not sure if that would be suitable). i may not know the whole shebang but i could detect a rift. and what do people fight about if not love? well, some, money, others, irreconcilable differences (annulment lang?). i know there's a long list but indulge me on this one: it's LOVE. this overused noun, which makes the world go round, has taken it's toll on my two homies. like an age-old telenovela, two friends fight over one lucky bastard (he's quite nice actually). as usual, one would be the bestfriend and the other would be bestfriend's friend (in this case roomate). hay, ang hirap mainlab!!! hahahaha

teleserye remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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drivin' myself insane

2009-07-14T22:27:39Z

they say "an idle mind is the devil's workshop"
how i wish the devil would find work elsewhere. whenever im left alone or not busy chatting, i would automatically go into a pensive mode. in all the years i fell and failed in love, this is the only time i got scared. im afraid to get hurt, that's a known fact, but not afraid to fall and wait for the right time the person will fall for me. i can be very patient, y'know.but this time, even the thought of it makes me paranoid. i always tell people that it's better to be honest and tell the person how you feel and fail in the process than not even trying. yet i cant practice what i preach. i need to be sure first if i really like him, because if it's just lust, i wont tell him anymore.kasi la din naman akong gagawin. bihira naman ako topakin na makipagmake-out. kung meron man, old flames lang o once, parang nadugo2 gang lang ako hahaha. yung di sadya pero di ko alam kung bakit may naganap na milagro, in the first place.
haaay. parang laging may slide show sa utak ko of the "aaaaw" moments that we have. worst, it would be manifested in my dreams. like one time i woke up crying coz in my dreams he was telling me how he really felt all these years. i just cried, as in hagulhol. and was asking him if he doesnt want to be friends anymore. kasi feeling ko, i wont be special anymore. na he would start lying to me about his escapades to avoid fights (which is normal kung magdyowa na kayo). alangan namang ok lang na may mga fubu sha na iba while kami da bah?kamusta naman yun? in fairness to him, kaya naman niyang maging faithful. ang tanong: hanggang kailan yun considering we wont be having sex (well, ideally, matatagalan kasi dapat comfy na ko na makita shang walang saplot and vice versa plus the "pain" factor na more of fear talaga).aaaargh i hate this feeling.
ewan ko pa kung talagang gusto ko sha kasi di ko talaga maimagine na bf/gf relationship ang meron kami. parang gusto ko lang cuddling (with clothes) o kulitan lang like we always do. masaya sana kung sha nga ang magiging sperm donor ko. imagine the family day we would be having. baka mas makulit pa kami sa bata. o mga sportsfest involving parents. o di ba ang cute? ayan kung ano2 na naman ang naiisip ko. tingin ko kailangan ko na magsimba. hmmm perhaps that's what ill do later. it works for me e.

drivin' myself insane remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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afternoon delights

2009-07-12T15:07:52Z

since i had my baby , afternoons became busier. im trying to learn new stuff, application softwares, chatting away, browsing and downloading torrents.of these all, i enjoy chatting most coz i can get in touch with friends from outer space and some local friends. it's my friend unagi whom i always chat with every so often. sabi ko nga he's a charm kasi whenever we're chatting dax would always get in the picture at ibubuzz ako, without me tellin him im online.

it's good that we're friends again, unagi and me. sabi nga ni jude ay parang role reversal lang ito hahaha. yes sha ang gustong bugbugin ni dax para matauhan hahaha. though they're not friends, he's seen him once. kaya naman bet niya ako iuuntog hahahaha. wala na shang alam insultuhin kundi si unagi hehehe pero joke lang naman para bwisitin ako. and lately, baligtad na kasi si dax na ang topic at ang love guru e si unagi. minsan nagulat ako kasi he asked me a question..

unagi: minahal mo ba ako kahit minsan (or something)
me: oo naman
u: hindi platonic ha
m: oo naman

end of story....

actually laging ganun.parang bitin.magtatanong pero la follow up.kaya siguro di naging kami despite years of waiting.nabingkong na ang tenga ni dax tuwing magkikita kami noon.i guess that's one of the factors why we're tight. ang walang sawa niyang pakikinig sa mga hinaing ko sa non-existent lovelife ko. or ang pagiinarte ko pag pinipilit niya kong gawin ang mga malalaswa niyang plano (not necessarily between the 2 of us). or minsan kami lang 2 masaya na kami kahit walang special na ginagawa. like walking in the rain (one of my favorite moments) like kids, ksi yung tig-50 pesos na payong lang yun kaya nililipad. nauwe, wet kami (kaming 2 ha, as in basa sa ulan).

in fairness to unagi, we've had our share of happy memories. i've always thought na courting involves harana, pagsisibak ng kahoy at pag-iigib ng tubig. may time na i would visit him sa province and the only source of water is tadaaaaan

u: be, wag ka na maligo
m: mainit e
u: kakaligo mo lang ah
m: kanina pa yun no

he would concede eventually, otherwise, i'd throw a fit. and you won't want to see me in that state. nevertheless, he would still enjoy my company (or pretend to) kahit sukahan ko pa sha.minsan half of his bod was covered with vomit (or what's left of my lunch), not only that, pati shoes soaked with, you know.
and yet, when i apologized, he accepted my apology like it wasnt a big deal. kung si dax yun, he would say "hu u?" daw sa text at kakalimutan na niya ko hahaha. he'd (dax) also be amazed on how i can live without sex.

d: ano ginagawa nyo pag magkasama kayo?
m: movies, inom, malling. parang tayo din lang.
d:mahina pala yun e
m: nirerespeto lang niya ko.lagi na lang ganun.lahat na lang nirerespeto ako. minsan naman bastusin nyo ko!
d:tara!
m: sira hahaha
d: ang tyaga mo din e.ang layo kaya nun
m: masaya na ko dun e. kahit magkatabi lang kami manood ng tv.basta kasama ko lang sha. yung parang ayaw mo matapos yung araw kasi you'll miss his presence.
d:i wont.
m; alam ko di mo sha gusto. im not tempted to do anything nasty with him yet basta lang masaya pag magkasama kami.i guess it's not physical.
d:MALAMANG!
m: heh magtigil ka.alam ko ayaw mo sa kanya.pero gusto ko sha!mahal ko sya! hahaha (monologue sessions ko yan.ate vi mode lang, na usually sha ang audience)
d: eeew
m: ano ka ba. minsan naiisip ko kung kumain na ba sha knowing his situation dun kasi abandoned nga ang drama niya.pano kung la na sha pagkain? ang payat nga niya nung nagkita kami e. kawawa naman.inaway ko pa.di talaga ako sweet. ang funny dun mas sweet pa sa kin ang mga guy friends ko.
d: e puro kasi bakla!
m: hahaha di sila.yung mga straight. si bab sweet yun. bubuhatin niya ko pag ayoko na maglakad.
d: si bab? di ko maimagine na sweet yun (they were teammates in college)
m: sa loob lang ng court mukhang maangas yun, pero sa labas, softie sha. ikaw sweet ka naman ah. minsan nga naiisip ko mas sweet pa ko sayo kasi i never cling to him while walking. di din uso sa min ang beso2 o hugging. except sa pagtulog kasi di ako nahihiyang dantayan sha.
d: style mo ha!
m: ulol. never ko shang hinarass no.
d: e di ba tinali mo na sha?
m: hahaha natandaan mo pala yun.muntik nako dun ha
d: mahilig ka kasi magmakaawa. kung ako yun, giba na ang babae.
m: kaw yun. manyak!hahaha
d: ay nako. bat di mo tanungin?
m: para ano? di nga niya kayang sabihin e. ayoko pagsisihan yun balang araw na kaya naging kami e dahil niligawan ko sha. saka di ko kaya. alam mo naman ang pride. kung di sha magsasabi, wag na lang.
d: narinig ko na yan! pero gusto mo pa din sha?
m: oo naman. pero di ako magsasabi. ang gusto kong lalaki may bayag.ayoko nung naghihintay ng chance na yung babae pa manligaw.
d: ang point dun e gusto mo pa din sha.
m: sino magkakampi?
d: syempre tayo, pangit yun e (hugs)

parte na rin ng afternoon delights ko ang mag-iiyak.a few weeks back, yun ang tema ng hapon ko. di ko matanggap na baka im falling for him. i know ive been comtemplating about it especially when i was trying to move on. i always tell ruthie pag pauwe na kami na what if sha na lang (hindi si ruthie ha). na sana magkagusto na lang ako sa kanya. kaso ayun nga, di ko naman matanggap.sabi nga, "be careful what you wish for". now, im scared shit of it. kahit sa pagtulog umiiyak ako. kasi di ko alam kung ano gagawin ko if ever. im content na sa honest relationship. kasi pag sakali, he wont tell me everything. unlike now na pag tinanong ko sha, he would tell me flat out ang sagot sa tanong ko.he doesnt have to hide kasi no matter what, tag-team kami forever. kahit pa alam niyang papagalitan ko sha, at the end of the day, kami pa din ang magkakampi. minsan naisip ko baka lust lang to. pero bat naman ngayon lang?haaaay kakaloka.feeling ko okay nako.back to basics na ulit.pero i wont forget na, one time, naging part sha ng afternoon delights ko

afternoon delights remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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moving on...

2009-07-10T22:40:02Z

do you ever get over a loved one? either someone you've loved for a long time, someone you loved deeply, or one who caused you so much pain? i used to think it would have a SCAR reaction (my own words). it would hurt while the wound is still fresh, but after that it would just leave a scar, no pain, but there's something left that would always remind you of the "accident" or whatever you wanna call it. there are many scenarios that could be associated with getting over issues....

kung ako na lang sana....

eto yung medyo one sided. yung ikaw (pa) lang ang nagmamahal. ang masaklap pa minsan, close kayo. ang laging drama jan e ikaw ang takbuhan pag malungkot sya.tapos magsesenti kung bakit iniwan ng dyowa o kaya may iba din shang pinagnanasaan. masakit di ba?kung pwede mo lang sabihin...... "kung alam mo lang kung gaano kita kamahal. na kung bibigyan mo ko ng chance, marerealize mong i'm everything you never thought you've always wanted". ako e, di mo lang ako makita kasi busy ka sa iba

one more chance

mula highschool magdyowa na kayo. on and off, pero alam mong kayo magkakatuluyan. until one day, sya na ang nakipagsplit. kaw naman kampante na babalikan ka pa niya, kasi nga he/she cant live without you. kaso naisip niya pala na he/she cant live with you anymore...sad sad sad. hanggang isang araw nabalitaan mo na may bago na sha. at di pa yun, nakilala lang niya sa chat. no this cant be, pano niya yun mamahalin e di naman sila talaga magkakilala pa? gusto mo sanang gayahin si bea " ako na lang, ako na lang ulit"..... tapos magbibigay ka ng long list of promises about things na alam mong ayaw niyang ginagawa mo at sasabihin mong magbabago ka na, pero dun pa din mauuwe,sa wala. nakamove on na sha pero ikaw hindi pa

typical love story

nagkakilala kayo sa office. mabait, presentable, smart, funny. naging kayo at parang ayaw mo na matapos lahat ng happiness. until one day, malalaman mo na may asawa na sha pero sabi niya hiwalay na sila. until one day, sabi niya babalik daw yung ex niya from the states at gusto shang makita. ano mafifeel mo dun?syempre ano naman ang laban mo e may past sila. you only do the best thing, ang lumayo na lang at magmukmok sa bundok tralala. you just wish him/her well and say you'll be fine. tapos susulat ka kay charo at ipapalabas sha sa maalaala mo kaya..winner.

pusong mamon

bet mo sha since forever. kahit 50 feet away nakikita mo ang ningning sa mata niya na feeling mo e sign ni batman at tinatawag ka. ikaw naman kuntento kana sa pagtingin2 kay kuya kasi shy ka at natatakot kang mabugbog. hanggang dininig ni lord ang pagnonovena mo kay st. jude at miraculously, you became friends. kuntento ka na dun e. yung nakakagimmick mo sha with other friends pero alam mo deep inside that you could be happier kung may chance sana na maging kayo.choosy pa ba sha, e mabait ka naman, kaya mo shang buhayin at kahit pa TOP ka e magpapabottom ka ng bonggang bongga mahalin ka lang niya. pero wait there's more. may paglukso ng dugo kang nafifeel pag kasama mo sha. no hinde yun ang heart mong nagpapalpitate kundi ang malansang amoy whenever he's around kasehodang di naman sha rereglahin ever! hala! isa din pala shang kapatid! ang hinayupak, papatol din lang di pa sayo. gagamitan ka pa ng it's not you it's me. di pa sabihin wiz kita bet. pero syempre dahil love mo sha, ayaw mong isiping pinaasa ka lang niya. and for all he's worth, tatanggapin mo pa din sha pag nagsabi shang it's you all along. aminin mo yan, te!yan ang story of your life. sad but true...

someone's always saying goodbye

ikaw ang taong hindi nababakante. di naman dahil mahilig ka pero you're the type na madali iapproach. di sila magdadalawang isip na magparinig kasi mukha namang di ka mananampal. ang totoo niyan, tama sila. ikaw ang tipo ng babaeng di kayang magwala o maghagis ng gamit. in short, iyakin ka lang. pero ikaw ang epitome ng dreamgirl: mabait, pasensyosa, maasikaso, understanding, adventurous and the list goes on. kaya naman tuwing mageend ang relationship, ikaw ay clueless. ano pa ba naman ang hahanapin nila e daig mo pa ang best friend cum barkada doubled with (parang movie tie-in lang???) yaya, cook, labandera, PA at ibpa. tapos bigla na lang shang manlalamig for no apparent reason kasi di ka naman nagger o warfreak.ok alng sana kung nambababae (NOT!!!) pero yung basta na lang nagbago ang mahirap tanggapin.so tatry mo magmove on at panibagong kalbaryo na naman sa next mong "predator".

ang tanong
pano ka nga makakarecover?

a. maghanap ng iba...
b. wait for it to die a natural death
c. magpakapokpok at lunurin ang sarili sa alak at drugs
d. umiyak at tingnan ang sarili sa salamin
e. maginarteng di affected pero lagi namang tulala
f. MAG-BLOG!!!!!!

ciao.....

moving on... remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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PART II: wants babies;wont have sex

2009-07-04T20:44:55Z

that same afternoon, ive been having episodes. i got sacred shit of the possibilities of me falling for HIM (name witheld for no reason at all..drama lang hehehe). i dont give in to peer pressure , and i wont assume either, which i think gives people the impression that im dense or unintersted. cant blame me, i dont want to fall for the wrong reasons. i know pain is inevitable but it would be like plunging into a pool head first without knowing its depth. that would be stupid. or am i? wag nyo ng sagutin kasi rhetorical yun. haaaay.

the other night, while we were having late dinner (or a very early breakfast at 200AM). i saw a couple with a pet sharpei. the dog was cuddly but i wanted a bigger pet. like a lab or rottweiler. i find big things cute, bags, phones, appetite hahaha. then i thought of babies (again). i havent felt so pressured. no one's pressuring me this time, they all gave up reminding me of the ticking clock, my biological clock, that is. cant blame them. i never felt the need then. sure id like to have babies but not yet, i told them. not until that effing sharpei showed up under our table ( during dinner/breakfast).
ruthie told me why dont you try pets first? id love to but when will i have a kid? the risk will be higher if i delay it for another year so it had to be this year or anytime soon....

ruthie: e pano ka nga magbubuntis e ayaw mo naman makipagsex? nanjan naman sha, alam naman niya ang gusto mo...kung ako sayo natry ko na yan matagal na especially kung hinaharass naman niya ko.
me: e ganun lang sha talaga.
r: di mo ba naisip na baka...
m: gusto niya ko?di ko maisip e.kasi kalimitan ng chicks niya mapuputi flawless alam mo yun. very pleasant.di pa din ako mapalagay kahit pa ang type niya daw e morena, tsinita, athletic smart...
r: o kita mo na. baka di mo lang nahahalata..
m: e bat ngayon lang? ang tagal na namin magkakilala e
r: malay mo noon pa di mo lang napansin
m: yeah minsan naiisip ko na ang tyaga niya sa kin,di ko naman nakakalimutan yung mga yun e. kaya ko nga sha love because of that.
r: bat kasi di mo try?
m: di ko maisip kasi kung ano magugustuhan niya sakin e di nga ako "fighter"!! sige isa-isahin natin...

a) dahil ba sa galing kong magprito ng

b) dahil ba sa mahilig ako.......sa rice

c) ang paminsan-minsan kong paghihilik?

d) o ang kamangha-mangha kong talent na gawing korteng heart ang tyan ko???

me: kakailang pa kasi antaba ko na nga.wla na sha alam gawin kundi kilitiin ang ko...

r: ayaw mo naman kasi magrisk.
m: hindi ko kaya. madedepress ako pag nawala sha. sha lang ang nakakapagpasaya sakin ng walang guilt feeling kasi nga platonic kami.
r: walang platonic no!
m: meron, kala mo lang wala pero meron
r: sige sino pa ang friend mong platonic?
m: si raspit saka si andoy! alam ko naman di kami attracted sa isat isa
r: hinde!! at one point im sure nagkaron yan.

PART II: wants babies;wont have sex remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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wants babies;wont have sex

2009-07-03T00:17:02Z

yes, i'm afraid im serious...ridiculous right? who doesn't want sex at this day and age? present!!!! i guess im a laaaaaaaaaaate bloomer. i remember having my first MU at the ripe age of 25 and havent had a slightest inkling to visit "establishments" to participate in any rigorous activity. the first time i set foot there was primarily due to curiousity. didnt get any success stories, poor exes. had lotsa fun though

let's get straight to the main point. yes, i want to have a baby/babies. ive always been crazy about kids, being an only child for a long time. id like to say im great with kids, especially the snotty ones and the terrible twos. thing is, i just cant have kids instantly. i dont want to adopt. i want my own kid. and im sure all of you knows how that's done. and that's the thing: I DONT WANT TO HAVE SEX....

i dont have anything against sex, how can i? i havent met sex. but sex has a following. heard many reviews about it, mostly amazing ;-) still it doesnt reassure me that i'd have the same fate as other women before me who enjoyed it. i think i have algophobia. im afraid of pain. physical pain that is. anything that would involve cuts or lacerations, count me out. i used to be afraid of injections. i had to overcome it when i got in the navy since i opt to donate blood (they say it's healthy). but i have a vivid imagination and i cant stand the thought that my hymen will be ripped during reproduction

last sunday, dax, jude and moi went out for a few drinks. supposedly, dax will introduce jude to 2 officemates who're also looking for dates and new friends. fortunately (for the friends or for jude, i dunno really hehehe), the officemates was tired from another gimmick the night before. and then there was three. we started out gimmick with them watching me eat my dinner. just woke up when jude picked me up from the house so i need to eat RICE!!!

after a few drinks, we talked about why we're not hitched yet.
jude: o dax kamusta naman. single ka ba ngayon?
dax: oo march o april pa wala...
j: ganun? e bat wala?
d: wala e.
j: ano bang type mo?
d: dapat gusto na magkababy kasi gusto ko na magstart ng family. saka mature magisip para di na hassle
j: ayun naman pala (sabay tinuhod ako!). o di ba ikaw gusto mko na din magbaby?
me: oo pero magkaiba kami ng gusto. ako kung di ako mahahanap ng prince charming ko, baby lang gusto ko. ayoko ng complications of having a husband.
tawanan... tipsy na kami ni jude e
j: ano ba kasing type mo? give me 5 traits/qualities
m: hmmm syempre matangkad, at least 5'10 o 5'11. smart. funny...nasabi ko na bang smart?
j: oo no
m: hmmm e funny?syempre athletic!saka...
d: e pasok nako sa apat ah

moment of silence... i was thinking e ano naman kung pasok ka sa requirements ko? sabay tuhod ni jude sakin..

m: ano bang panglima? mabait syempre. very general pala.basta kasundo ko keri na yun!

when we got home, i offered him a towel so he could freshen up. he was asking for...
d: wala ka bang boxers?
...... i was thinking "ako nga naiilang isuot sarili kong boxers e...."
m: di kasya sayo (baka magpyesta ang bayan pag nanigas ka sa umaga!)
d: kasya, nagkasya nga sayo e.
m:letse!hahanapan kita ng iba..
d:hahaha

we slept in my single sized bed. as usual his big hands were all over my torso. awkward....

i wiggled a bit (we originally had a spoon position) so i was lying upright when he put aleg between mine, i can hardly breath...(i can hear Jude's voice in my head... AAAAWKWAAAAAARD!). alyanna moved a bit and sat right up and commented:

alyannna: o marz, nag-asawa ka na pala? hehehe
me: oo nga te tinake home ko na
alyanna: hi dax!baba muna ko marz.
chance ko na to!!!!para lumipat ng bed.behaved naman sha till morning.nagbreakfast lang kami ng SPAM.
haaaay...to be continued.

wants babies;wont have sex remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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dehydration

2009-06-30T23:30:01Z

may namamatay kaya sa dehydration? la lang, naisip ko lang. no im not contemplating suicide, that would be a less painful way to leave loved ones behind though ( i wouldnt know actually since di naman ako nag-attempt pa so di ko macompare). pero sasakit naman ang ulo ko in the process (ng pag-atungal), so no thanks. kaya ko naisip kasi lately nagiging iyakin ako.naloloka na ata ako o nagiging manic depressive nako aka bipolar.wala namang mood swings, just generally on a pensive mood.weird hehehe pastime lang magdrama tutal matagal na ko di naiiyak.

dehydration remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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goodbye michael....

2009-06-26T22:58:17Z

let's offer a moment of silence to michael, who left his legacy to G*d-knows-who and died a natural death despite undergoing too many surgeries, one of which could have caused his death a few years earlier,while on the table. i dont hate michael oh no. i can still remember dancing to billie jean, bad, smooth criminal and of course, thriller. covering my neck with glitters and wearing gloves while playing taguan,was a cool deal back then (in our neighborhood that is).perhaps im just a weird kind (who got weirder during the latter years hehehe) trying to fit in. oh well i've said my eulogy for michael, now i can take his place as well...

presenting, the newest member of the WALK of FAME...

clap, clap, clap..... twenkyu so match!!!

goodbye michael.... remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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Asymptote

2009-06-26T21:52:17Z

Let A be a curve defined parametrically by x = x(t), y = y(t). Say A goes to infinity at t=t0 if either x(t) or y(t) goes to ±∞ as t approaches t0, where t0 may itself be ±∞. In this case, a curve B is said to be an asymptote of A if the distance between (x(t), y(t)) and B approaches 0 as t approaches t0.

There are many different cases that can be treated separately, such as linear asymptotes (below), although intuitively the two functions become arbitrarily close.

A specific example of linear asymptotes can be found in the graph of the function f(x) = 1/x, in which two asymptotes are seen: the horizontal line y = 0 and the vertical line x = 0.

There are multiple ways of interpreting asymptotic behavior. In particular the statement "A function f(x) is said to be asymptotic to a function g(x) as x → ∞" has any of at least three distinct meanings:

f(x) − g(x) → 0.
f(x) / g(x) → 1.
f(x) / g(x) has a nonzero limit.
More formally, curves A and B are asymptotic if and only if there exist continuous functions

CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!
naisip ko na yan e. baka asymptotic ang relationship namin ng prince charming ko. kasi parang up to now, di pa din niya ko makita. minsan tingin ko yun na pero di pa pala. lumalapit pero di dumidikit. o diba? pinacomplicate ko lang by comparing it sa asymptote.tingin nyo? baka mahina sya sa direction hmmm di ako makakpayag niyan!! magaala-hansel ako at maglealeave ako ng trail!

o kaya eto...

hmmm or this..

ang tanong:

Asymptote remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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salawahan

2009-06-24T22:45:27Z

napapansin ko lately na parang wala na yung dati kong sigla. parang lagi akong malungkot o kaya may iniisip. wala naman akong sakit (sa utak alam ko meron, malaki!). di naman din ako natatae. at definitely wala akong TB! hmmm. buti na lang nanonood ako ng the buzz! si papa lloydie pala e nalilink kay Broooffa! di to pupwede!walang makakaagaw sa one ang only lloydie ko. oo nangangaliwa ako, pero si zanjoe ang kinakaliwa ko because of mr. cruz. buti na lang clinear up niya yan or else..susugod ako sa bahay nila at magsusumbong ako kay mommy!

ano ba tong sinasabi ko? teka inom muna ako ng kape para kilabutan ako. prozaaaaaaaaaac!!!

salawahan remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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jamaican

2009-06-24T22:12:46Z

alam ko di ka naman maitim at di rin kulot ang buhok mo pero that describes you best. tanda mo ba nung nagiinuman tayo nung una pang panahon, napagusapan natin ang Jamaica. nung una akala ko nagpapatawa ka, kaya pilit mong tinatalo ang matitinding banat ko, na ewan ko naman kung bakit sa tagal mo ng nambobola ng babae e di mo man lang narinig ang mga salitang...

m:"you're everthing i never thought i've always wanted"
?: pota! ang galing ah. isa kang alamat!
m: ano yun???
?: slow! LEGEND!
m: parang ang tanda naman alamat
?: e matanda ka na kasi
m: tseh sasamain ka sakin ha!
? ako may alam kaso di ko maisip. parang jamaica.
m: jamaica?nosebleed!!!
?: jamaica wanna...ewan!
m: laos ka pala e.
?: panalo nga yung sabi niya (yung kinahuhumalingan mo noon) sa kin e. tiningnan niya yung shirt ko, tapos sabi niya " i knew it, made in HEAVEN!"
m: naknam!! taob ka dun hahaha at nabighani ka naman agad?
?: hinde no!
m: sows kaya pala problemado ka kung pano mo ligawan!hehehe
?: e pano nga?youre the expert, tell me.
m: mahilig ba sha sa pandesal? araw2 mong dalhan
?: hirap naman!
m: o di ba sabi mko gusto mo sha.o kaya haranahin mo! kakilig yun no. isama mo lahat ng brod mo!hehehe
?: seryoso ka ba?
m:oo naman. o kaya pagigib mo ng tubig! kung ako yun sasagutin kita agad kahit mukha ka pang swelas!ang sweet kaya nun.
?: sweet ako no!
m: kaya pala...e sinagot ka na ba?kung ayaw niya wag na kamo.ang arte2 niya!
?: oo nga...

fast forward to present...

i hear someone pounding on our door. thinking it was just another housemate facing an "emergency" (najejebs na ata sa lakas kumatok) i didnt ask who it was and automatically opened the door. and there you were grinning at my pajamas.
m: bat ka nandito?
?: bilis mo naman bumaba.
m:di pako umaakyat no.san ka galing?
?:jan sa tabi2!
m:tara dito at mainit jan!

inside my room...
?: tangena!nilalaplap ako dun. (sabay tanggal ng tshirt at higa sa kama)
m: ng bakla????!!!
?: hinde no. babae! si _____
m: o di ba maayos naman yun saka kras mo yun dati di ba?
?:di pwede yun e.ano ka ba di ba _____ niya yung ex ko?
m: naks kailan ka pa tumanggi?
?: yoko nun.true love na ang gusto ko!
m: "true love"?? di sana nagpa-trulab ka!!!
?: hindi yung trulab na alam natin, true love talaga!
m: nakow! patay tayo jan, di ka na makakakuha ng truelove no!
?: yun nga ang gusto ko, kaso di ko sha makukuha.
m: (wife mode) anong pangalan! anong pangalan? sumagot ka!!!! ( i was supposed to ask kung sino kinahuhumalingan niya)
?: _______(my name!)
m:huh? ah si ________(nickname ng dati niyang fubu na kapangalan ko)
?: huh? wala na yun tagal ko ng di nakikita yun! ikaw ang sinasabi ko! (sabay hawak sa kilikili ko)
m: waaaaaaaaaag, tangena nakiliti ako!!! (katay mode) *series of expletives and primal sounds*
?: bakit???ha? ano?
m: pag ako nakawala dito yari ka sakin, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag!aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
(hingal!)
ayan kita mo na ang ginawa mo, parang binagyo ang kwarto ko.uminit pa!natanggal ang saksak ng aircon!
?: ewan ko sayo.uwe na nga ako! (buwiset??)
m: (di ko pinigilan...after a few, humiga ulit at nag-inarte!) e bat nga di mo pa pinatulan si ____?
?: ayoko sa kanya..
m: e ano pala?
?: gusto ko uupo sa kin (now i got confused...pinapaupo ba niya ko sa kanya, kasi it seems inuutusan niya ko habang nakatingin sa kin)
m:anooooooo? (kagatin ko nga sa tyan, kala niya di ako gaganti sa kanya ha)
?: aaaaaaaaaaaaaah
m: sakit ba??

bigla na lang umikot ang paningin ko. the next thing i know, nakapatong na sha sakin, pinning me down.

m:waaaaaaaaah ayoko na, please
?: ano na peace? suko na ha?
m: opo. peace na..pleaaaase
(pero pilit niyang pinapasok ang daliri niya...sa kilikili ko, kayo naman!! la pa tayo dun sa scene na yun! then narealize ko na nakataas na ang pantulog ko sa may bandang baba ng collarbone ko) hoy! ano yan ha! ano gagawin mo?
?: gaganti ako (didikit niya yung mukha niya sa tyan ko!)
m: ayaw! ayaw!! peace na sorry na?please...
?: ano ng gagawin mo sa kinagat mo?
m: band-aid!! (puss in boots mode, sa shrek while begging)
?: (mukhang kakagat na! sabay tingin ulit) hindi yun.ano ang gagawin mo sa kinagat mo?
m: betadine??
?: wrong answer (habang buong kamay niya ang nakatakip sa mukha ko!di ko malaman kung finifeel niya ang lips ko o gusto niyang isubo ko ang mga daliri niy!)
m: umphhhh.di ako makahinga!! agua oxinada!!
?: (this time unan naman ang tinakip sa mukha ko while im covering my chest) o ano tinatakpan mo jan?? (habang ginagalaw ang bra ko para lang mapraning ako)
m: (muffled sound dahil sa unan) ta*na toigolawn mow yawn.(hingal) pag ako nassuufocaaate ha!
?: hahahahaha
m:gusto mo masaktan ah!yoko na!
?: ano ang gagawin mo sa kinagat mo? uh-uh wrong!!
m: pakshet!waaaaaaah.
?:hawakan mo ulo ko. (yung mukha niya nakaharap sa chest ko)
m: ano?
?: yung kamay mo lagay mo sa ulo ko!
m: ayaw...
?:ilagay mo..
m: ayaw nga...
?: hahahaha i hetchu anymore!
m: i hetchu too!
tumigil din...
m:may kkwento ako sayo...
?: snore.....
m: huy!
?: ayoko marinig..
m: sungit mo ha.
?: o ano?
m: gumimik ako sa moa saka sa malate.
?: oo nga, dito ka sa kabila ko
m: (lipat ako sa right side niya, dala ang unan ko) ayun nga nag moa kami, tapos dinner sa abe, huy nakikinig ka ba?
?: oo naman.
m:ayun nga nag moa kami, tapos dinner sa abe.ano ba yang ginagawa mo sa pajama ko?
?: wala no tulog ako e.
m: hinihila mo panty ko e! (pillow fight!)
?: hindi ah. kwento ka na ulit.
m: ayun nga nag moa kami, tapos dinner sa abe... hooooy!!!! bat mo pinapatong yang kamay mo sa boobs ko! naknam!!
?: hindi naman e. la akong ginagawa no! natutulog lang ako dito e. (sabay talikod)
m: kukutusan kita ha.
?: dito ka hug mo ko.
m: --->hugs him
?: tanggalin mo nga yan unan mo, dikit mo boobs mo sa likod ko!
m: letse! puro ka kamanyakan! bahala ka jan.

after a few, he was sleeping like a baby!

okay, OA na yan. di sha ganyan kagwapo. pero yan ang itsura niya nung iniwan ko sha sa kama ko. haaaaay ano bang gagawin ko sayo?

jamaican remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

2009-05-19T22:46:42Z

parang 3D lang no...la lang la lang akong magawa. "L" stands for LIKE.. yan ang generic name ko para sa kras ko.actually pangalawa ko nang beses gagamitin to. nagamit ko na sha 2 mos ago sa isa ko pang ex kras, after ni "dark" vader. remember him? yung roomate ko who died a natural death (ay mali, yung feelings ko ang nag-die, hindi sha).

heniways, ang bagong L sa buhay ko ay isang teamate. ironically, maliit sha, as in short. kainis di ba e barda pa naman ako, as in bardagol according to my gay teamates hahaha. di kami bagay, physically. ang isa pang ironic e medyo tsinito sha. hmmm not really my type.pero his smile is so refreshing. parang maaalis ang pagod mo pag nagsmile sha sayo hehehe.para tinatanong niya kung ano gusto mo kainin....mahihiya ka namang sabihin na siya sana! wahahaha joke lang...baka macensor tayo niyan. ayun nga, i was fretting over the lack of players (female) during the game. there's a probability that i'll be late for work again. so la talaga ako sa mood nung nagwawarm up ako magisa sa isang corner, lalo pat wala naman si L. out of the blue, bigla na lang shang tumatakbo staright into my arms, sa CR pala para magpalit. nagulat na lang ako kasi my mood changed from being lethargic to ecstatic (parang di sila match no, pero that's how i felt). lumabas ang U.S. (uncontrollable smile) sa kissable(NOT!) kong lips. buong game di ko sha mapigil :-P. then lumabas ang top ten ni callboi at nakita ko sha...i dont care kung bi sha o alien basta i want him!!!

naiimagine ko na ang una naming pagtatagpo ni papa john...
maharot: so, how's the weather?
papa: huh?
m: sarap ng panahon no?
p: natikman mo? hehehe
m: di na kailangan. kaw kahit di ko pa natitikman mukhang masarap din e!(blushing!)
p: wapak!
m: sinampal ako, di pala kami talo!

kidding aside, i like him regarless sa preference niya. bihira kasi akong kiligin kaya pagbigyan nyo nako. literal na buong shift kong tinititigan ang pic niya sa pc ko. dedma na sa loooooooong call at kakulangan sa focus sa sinasabi ni customer....basta masilayan ko lang ang pic niyang parang nakikipagtitigan sakin wahahaha... por dat, I LOVE YOU JOHN na ang isisigaw ko sa next video ko :P

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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Doppelgänger

2009-05-13T21:49:41Z

this is meant for another friend but i dont think he would appreciate being compared to a girl. athena won't mind though. this is how he/she/it would look like in drag hehehe and maverick (of ariel and maverick fame) in retro

whoa! i know it's exaggerated but dax has his illusions. this one's mine though. back then, he would say he looks like jomari yllana, because people tell him so. not a bad comparison since he was still "innocent" (NOT!!!) back then. then he grew his hair longer and claimed he looked like antonio banderas (Huwaaaaaaaaat?). the funny thing is, girls believe this. gullible beings or perhaps it was dax who was gullible hahaha

when alyanna went to our house, my brother's impression was he's gay (he really is). when it was his turn to visit me in my apartment he asked who would be there. it told him athena ( ah yung mukhang addict? --he was referring to a former housemate, not athena), alyanna (ay yung nagpunta sa bahay na kamukha ni kuya kim!). por dat, i present alyanna!

the first day i laid eyes on him, i cant pinpoint who he looked like. he was way thinner then, fit if i may say so. he could do a sit-up/sec. it dawned on me that he looks like anjo. he vehemently denied this, but began calling me "johnny" (bestfriend johnny ni tikboy). even dax calls him kuya hahaha (that's when he still looks like jomari).problem is dax is a year(level) ahead of us (just a few months older) so babsy finds that hard to accept. he would extend his middle finger everytime dax would call him kuya from afar.

yes! the telenovela king. he's the first person gay friends would ask about (even straight ones) once they see my picture with a couple/group of friends. and he can really pose and talk to the camera!

it's her dream(daydream), that she looks like angelica panganiban. sometimes, she would even imitate the dance moves in ASAP while we laugh out loud. even her avatar would be her pic hehehe. some fan she is!

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of books and men

2009-04-27T01:28:32Z

this text message i received from my spammer friend hanna kept me thinking. i would agree that at some point, men are like books. they come in different shapes and sizes and they tell you many things, mostly fictional hahaha. not that i'm an expert on men. but i have many guy friends who won't hesitate to tell me a thing or two about their not too discrete escapades. a few months ago, i devour 3 books in a week due to lack of social life. not that i dont have an option. i just don't feel any urge to go out with friends and splurge (as if naman may gagastusin!), so i ended up spending my money on books. they're mostly fictional FBI cases involving murder and serial killers or conspiracies yet to be proven ( i don't know if i need to be bothered but i just love these sort of stories). i go to booksale and books for less so i can get my money's worth. i wish i could say the same about men. no, i don't buy men, that's for sure, but sometimes i don't think i'm getting my "time's" worth waiting for them to sweep me off my feet. it just doesn't happen. during pensive modes, i would be asking "is it me?" do i drive them away (most of the time i drive them nuts, i know that for a fact). is there anything i need to improve when i deal with them? as i've mentioned, i have lots of guy friends, therefore, they can tolerate me.but then again, most of the guy friends i have now are gay so you know.... my "barako" pals would always say i'm a catch (aheeem, saka na bayad niyo ha). im fun to be with, no hang ups about eating at turo2, no qualms about hearing their pornographic stories about their current flings or exes etcetera. in short, jologs at kunsintidor. (not to mention gorgeous chareeeng!!!) it's just that i'm a bit "scary" meaning i have an aura that implies that "i'm not afraid to lose you if you stray", yun bang parang di sila tatagal ng 24 oras pag nalaman kong may tinext silang ex or prospective fling. to which i retaliated "what's wrong with that?" i mean who would want a two-timing "bastard" (di ito ikaw, classmate hehehe) for a partner? then he said exactly! that's the main reason men is afraid of you. not wanting to justify their mistakes, my friend emphasized on their need to feel "indispensable". he said as much as you would love to feel "emotionally secure", we want to feel indispensable. even if we don't stray(which is so unlikely for him hahaha), the fact that we feel threatened by such independence may make us divert our affection for some girl. he said he knows it sounds lame and weak but that's the case for most men. they may project a very arresting persona but deep inside, they hurt, they flinch, they cower like women do. and the thought of a woman who can dump they at the blink of an eye scares them like hell. hmmm....maybe he's right, iam a bit scary. o sige na nga nakakatakot na ko, happy??? still, i wouldn't lessen my standards or lose my principles just to please someone, nor settle for someone who's available. at times i wish i could, i mean just fall for the next best guy but that just wouldn't be fair. i believe that if any effort is exerted to fall for someone, that would be a waste of time.we don't choose who to love. it just happens.but (isang malaking BUT) we have a control over our actions. we do things consciously, regardless if it's right or wrong. it's just a matter of what you believe in, ce n'est pas? how i wish men are like books, choose whichever you like, understand them just by reading `em. but then, men are far more complicated.....sad but true.

of books and men remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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a sad fairy tale

2009-06-24T22:40:28Z

once upon a time,in an unknown kingdom, there lived a princess who has no royal blood but thinks she's a princess nonetheless. she secretly believed in a happily ever after ending. tired of her "royal" duties, she went wandering in the palace grounds, escaping the guards just to have a puff of marlboro. a frog was doing the same in a pond near the bushes where the princess was hiding. to make the long story short, i'll have to end this. just kidding..

the princess and the frog became good friends. as days pass, the princess got fond of the frog in the pond, she finds it(the frog) extremely funny (looking?). like all friendship, they have their ups and downs. most of the time, the frog would forget to show up on time (for various reasons) or doesn't show up at all (again, for various reasons). but the princess is a very patient person (feisty alright, but patient still). she would forgive the frog everytime. their war modes would last for hours, days or weeks even. their friendship has a switch, sometimes on but mostly off. the princess tried to understand that maybe, since they came from different class and order (the princess being a mammal under order primates while kermit=amphibian order anura) they totally have different set of values which may account for their misunderstandings. given this fact, the princess still considered the frog a good friend.

subconciously, the princess was hoping that the frog is a true prince and was just cursed by a snotty hag whom he had wronged before. the frog if not for his appearance, could pass for a human being. he's nice, funny, sweet, has emotions and could talk, mind you. one time, the frog asked the princess "has it ever crossed your mind that we two could be an item?". with a spark of hope, the princess answered semi-truthfully "with everyone teasing me, of course". but at the back of her mind she would have wanted to say "always". there were nights (and days) that all she could think about is the frog. has it eaten? where could it be now? does it ever think of me as much as i think of it? does it value the friendship as much as she does? probably not. maybe it's off to some place to get acquainted with its fellow frogs, croaking all night, looking for flies to feast on. after that incident, the frog didn't ask anymore, he would always ask her out, visit her, talk to her, but would never ask the same question he asked before. this made the princess feel unattractive. she was even thinking, am i not even lovable for a frog?

the princess tried to accept things as they are and remained friends with the frog. but the frog having lacked education since there were no frog school in the kingdom, didn't learn anything from his mistakes. he repeatedly do things much to the dismay of the princess; lame excuses, broken promises blah blah blah. the princess would always remind him that her patience has a limit, that one day, they may part ways, go on with their lives without looking back. that only the happy memories will remain, but not the person. the frog just shrugged (yes they can do that).

one morning, the princess woke up from a dream. in that dream, she was telling the frog how much she loved it. she stopped entertaining other friends (be it a person or an animal) just because.... it was her choice though and had no regrets in doing so. the frog said "why didn't you tell me?" the princess replied with tears rolling down her cheeks "i could have loved you more than you can imagine, but you never gave me reasons to".

it turned out the frog is just your ordinary frog......not the prince the princess would have wanted it to be....

a sad fairy tale remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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lost in love

2009-04-22T21:32:37Z

im sure at one point in time, you have mistaken attraction, lust or pure boredom for love. who hasn't, right? who, in their proper mind, doesnt want to feel love and be loved as well? i know im not the sanest person you can meet and im told worse things, so i dont share the same thinking. sure i'd like to be in love and be loved but i dont equate a mere crush to love no matter how ecstatic i get whenever i see my eye-candy. i can stay in limbo (kilig phase) for quite some time and not really think im in love with the person. i dunno if that's a good thing though. sometimes i feel im incapable of loving again. i mean falling in love. with my long list of requirements, people may think im a perfectionist. i beg to disagree though hehehe. i am capable of loving (after a series of investigating, experimenting and of course, pseudo-dating). the question is: WHO???

i havent met anybody new that catches my attention. i dont date, no trysts, no nothing. sure i get to meet guys at work but no one seems to meet the standards. i tried checking friends' friends but no luck. i always end up discovering questionable traits. there was one though that seems to remind me of someone, but then i lost interest for some (undisclosed) reason hahaha. he would have been okay. nice, somewhat funny, not too stocky and the whole shebang. tsk tsk tsk too bad so sad....

my "spiritual adviser" told me to just forget them and move on. surely, someone will come and sweep me off my feet, i said. someone nice smart funny and loving. my prince charming i told him. then he said..
"wala na kokonti na lang kami!! hahaha"
i retorted."he'll come. what are you implying? na d niya ko mahahanap, ganun?!?"
he simply said " nagiisa na lang ako!"
that made me frown, not because im mad but that statement confused me. is he making a pass at me?
"so anong iniimply mo? na di na niya ko mahahanap o ikaw na lang ang last resort ko?"
he just laughed...

my friend ruthie tells me "alam mo ikaw minsan, dense ka din e! obvious naman na gusto ka nila di mo naman pinapansin"
i said: it's not that. ayoko lang mag-assume tapos binobola lang naman ako. you know how i hate liars and players.
ruthie: naman!may nag-oofer naman ah. yung isa panay ang reto sa yo sa iba, that's a sign. you just have to read between the lines.
me: what if im dyslexic? i may be getting the wrong signals. why cant they just tell me bluntly?? yung meron namang sincerity.
r: tingin mo sa angas mong yan di sila maiintimidate?
m: e wala pala silang b*y*g! di din sila pupwede kung sa simpleng pagsasabi di nila magawa.i wont settle for anything less hehehe
r: haaaaaaaaay ewan ko sayo.
m: un lang naman hinihintay ko.sincere at matapang
r: na funny na matangkad na brusko na mabait at smart.perfect na yun!
m: uhmmm i rest my case...for now

lost in love remains copyright of the author maharot, a member of the travel community Travellerspoint.

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